According to my latest "Dear Peregrine" letter from the Conservatives, whilst the Labour Party are tearing themselves apart, the Tories are "building a country that works for everyone".
Well, that's kinda comforting. I'd truly love to live in a country that works for everyone, but I can't speak any more that a few words of any Scandinavian languages. "Þegar þú talar fljótt ég get ekki skilið þig", or "Har du noen brukt cornflakes?", won't get you very far in Iceland or Norway so that's that knocked on the head!
So this is exciting news readers, is it not?
The poor Tories say that it's alright for the Labour Party as they are funded by the Trades Unions... although they left out the bit about the 600,000 Labour members who pay membership fees, as opposed to the 150,000 Tories ( a number which, according to Norman Tebbit, is likely to drop) who send their money to the Conservatives. But what about all those people that Cameron just elevated to the peerage, handed knighthoods or made companions of honour? What do they do with their millions?
According to the email they sent me, not on this occasion from a big name to impress me... yeah well, to try to impress me... but just signed, "the Conservatives", "people in kitchens and living rooms all over Britain are looking for a party that will build a country that works for them".
But I thought that we already had a party which was doing just that...that in fact the writer had already told me in the first paragraph that this party not only existed but that they were indeed the Tories.
So, pardon me, but I'm confused. Why are people looking in their living rooms and kitchens for them? They are in London in posh restaurants, clubs and possibly even knocking shops. And why is no one looking in bathrooms and bedrooms? Or does that have overtones that Tories don't like to mention? Well, not in front of plebs.
Well, I expect it's not my place to query all that, but given the drivel of these statements, I'm not surprised that no one wanted to sign the email.
Anyway, the good news is that you can pay £25 and get a mug that says "Theresa May a country that works for everyone" which leaves me even more confused, because I had no idea that Theresa May was a country... or that she was working for everyone.
But then, I have to say, ya know that if you'd pay £25 for something you can get in Morrisons for £1.25, you don't really need a mug.
Because you kinda ARE a mug.
Just got a bit of mail offering me a credit card with only 17.9%apr, although maybe I should go for a payday loan at only 1272%apr?
ReplyDeleteLuckily I don't need any borrowing facilities but many people have been lured or herded into the money trap. Remind me, what rate are these firms getting their money off the BoE at now?
That is absolutely outrageous, Gerry.
DeleteHow can they change 0.25% to 17.9% and get away with it.
In the supermarket yesterday I noticed two papers (can't remember which), one saying that Mark Carney had told banks that they must pass on the reductions; the other saying that banks wouldn't be cutting their rates.
What a mess of a country.
To be fair since they got elected to be a majority government despite the complete arse they'd had of things as a coalition, I think mugs are what comes to their mind when the think of the electorate.
ReplyDeleteLimited edition - probably just as well they didn't order too many. I imagine most Tory donors will be looking for more than a crap mug for their dosh - at the very least a Companion of Honour.
Munguin said that he'd not send them a halfpenny till he got the hand of one of Andy Airmiles' daughters, and the title "prince" to go with it.
DeleteWhen I pointed out that he was a republican, he answered "so what?".
So I took the horrifying step of showing him a photograph of the two of them with hats on... and he changed his mind in a second.
Gerry we keep getting offered on which charges a whole lot more than that, something like 37.5%. Don't need it we have one from our Bank and we also have another which never gets used. I agree though that if I was broke, and we often have been the worst thing for anyone is a credit card of any sort. I had a friend who as a single Mum moved her loans around every month so she never paid. Would catch up eventually.
ReplyDeleteAs for Mugs Munguin, I have two with pictures of our Nicola as Che Guevara, now one is a little faded on one side but I think we will treasure them. Tories tend to make me sick physically and I like to enjoy my coffee. Helena
They are poison unless you use them only to defer payment till the end of the month and then pay everything off.
DeleteI've got one which pays 1% cashback. I buy something on it; I come home, and I transfer the money from current account into it. So it never builds up any debt, and I get 1% off everything I buy. They must hate me.
To use it for borrowing is desperation. Unfortunately, I know, some people can be desperate.
bugger hugger-mugger
ReplyDeleteThat's them ...'DaB'???
Delete