Sunday 10 April 2016


Last week was certainly not been a good week for David Cameron.

There was the news that his government was spending £9 million of taxpayers' money on political leaflets to explain his view of the EU, or to put it another way, why he thinks it is important that the UK vote to stay. 

He excused this by saying it was the view of the British government and therefore it was right that the government (taxpayer) fund it. 

But of course it is not. It is, in fact, the view of some of the British government. It is not, for example, the view of Mr Grayling, or Mr Gove, Ms Patel, etc. Perhaps this other half of the British government should be allowed £9 million to give a contrary explanation?

Then there was the little matter of Mrs Cameron seeming inability to dress herself without the aid of a £53,000 a year assistant, employed by US, you and me,  to ensure that she didn't leave the house unsuitably attired of a morning. (It's rather a lot for a lady's maid. Ask the Queen's dressers how they feel about earning £53,000 a year.)

So why? 

This government is taking £30 a week from sick people and sending lads suffering from Downs, autism and epilepsy, and who can't read or write, 20-page forms to fill in to prove that they are entitled to some miserly state benefit. Meanwhile Mrs Cameron, who's seemed relatively sentient to me on every occasion that I have seen her, apparently can't go out of the house without someone there to check she's put her vest on the right way round. 

And even if she can't manage dressing, what has it got to do with you and me? So Munguin asked himself some questions... then, as is his way, without waiting for my response, answered them.

Is Mrs Cameron an employee of the government? 


Does it matter to the country if she wears a brown dress with blue shoes, a pink striped hat and an orange handbag? 


What is Mrs Cameron's role in the running of the country?

She has none, beyond being the partner of the prime minister. She is quite at liberty to attend or not attend social functions with him. (Several partners in the past have decided to absent themselves from functions, and to dress themselves, just like you and I and most of the rest of the country seem to be able do.) If Mrs Cameron decides to avail herself of the hospitality of state functions, what she wears to them is sod all to do with us.

So why are we paying someone to put her clothes on for her? 

The sick joke of us paying taxes & getting cuts to public services while our tax haven PM uses £53k of our taxes for his wife's stylist.
Then, of course, we have the revelations (which it took four days and four different fairy stories to unearth) that Cameron failed to declare income from off shore investments. Nuff said. He criticised other people for doing it. His chancellor called them criminals. And then when asked about his involvement in offshoring (given his father's involvement) he did an Alistair Carmichael and lied through his teeth.

Perhaps one of the people most entitled to feel aggrieved at this news was Jimmy Carr, who tweeted (never mind the spelling): 

I'm going to keep it classy. It would be ‘morally wrong’ and ‘hypocrytical’ to comment on another individual’s tax affairs.
Despite the protests against him in London on Saturday Mr Cameron hasn't done the decent thing and stood down. Maybe, like in Iceland where herra Gunnlaugsson resigned, there are others in the Cabinet equally as guilty as he is and the last thing they want now are calls for an election.

Oh, and wouldn't it be nice if the state broadcaster didn't have to be reminded that this was NEWS!
Now today we learn from the BBC that the PM has published his tax returns in an effort to dispel any notion that there's been something untoward in his tax dealings. 

OK, so it turns out it was not his tax returns that he published at all, but a summary thereof. So what the hell use is that? 

I mean, seriously, you wouldn't expect him to include any dubious dealings on his tax returns, would you?  And the "summary", as opposed to the real thing is even more worthless, because it is dependant on our belief (or not) that his staff are telling the truth. 

And so far the truth has been the missing magic ingredient in this whole sorry débacle.

But there's more... The returns also show that Mrs Mary Cameron, his mother, gave David two separate gifts of £100,000, each in 2011. Why? Was he hard up? Could he not afford lunch? Or one of these "proper suits" his mother insists people should wear?

Alternatively, could it have been in an effort to reduce the duties on her death?

Mrs Cameron herself is taking a break from lecturing people about the quality of their suits (Dave could have nearly 100 of them with that £200,000), the straightness of their ties and their lusty renditions of God Save the Queen, to have instead, cross words with the press about how her little David has done nothing wrong and it's all a fuss about nothing.

But in fact, dear lady, it is a fuss about something. No one is seriously suggesting that he or his father have done anything particularly illegal or indeed anything that other very rich people do. 

But David Cameron and George Osborne, prime minister and chancellor, are on record as saying that they feel any kind of tax dodging is morally insupportable. 

Clearly, but not if you are "one of them".

For all the negatives of the European Union, it has, at least been making efforts to introduce across the market rules about tax avoidance. And guess which country has been blocking these moves? Yes, that's right, the same one which has blocked tariffs on Chinese steel while blaming the EU for the fact that they can't act.

For an ex PR man, Cameron has given an object lesson on how not to handle a crisis.  

I was pondering this morning what Cameron would do it this was an embarrassing member of the Cabinet, rather than him, that was in this mess...

...Or what the BBC, which is playing down this massive story, would have had to say had this (laughably) been Mr Corbyn, or Nicola Sturgeon?
On reflection, she looks like she's wearing the bedroom curtains. 
PS: I just read that Mr Cameron gets the Conservative Party to help pay for his suits and for his wife's clothes. I wonder if his mother knew about that! I'm so glad I didn't respond favourably to any of his "Dear Peregrin" begging letters. I can hardly afford my own clothes never mind paying for Mr and Mrs Cameron's.


  1. Nice one Munguin and Tris, another case of do as I say and not as I do. I see that Nicola has published her tax return as has wee Lexus though Labour are going to talk about bringing in a bill after they debate about it and of course IF they ever get elected. I see nobody wants to point the
    finger at those responsible for the P F I schools, well none whose name is G Brown oh and the Labour Party. Helena

    1. Absolutely. One rule for the toffs and another for folk like us.

      My neighbour asked me if I thought that I was safe from investigation. I told him my money was hidden so far away that even I couldn't find it.

      But then, as fate would have it, later this afternoon I came upon it at the bottom of my underwear drawer. The entire £7:23, 2 € cents and 20 whatever they have in Malaysia! So I am undone!

      I'm not sure what publishing your returns is about. If I were on the fiddle it wouldn't show up in my income tax statement, would it?

      I see they are even trying to blame the SNP for the schools fiasco.

      Craig Murray is on the button.

      Gerry built, designed to last for as long as the company can make money out of them and not a minute longer.

      Disaster of an idea.

      Nationalise all of them.

    2. Where were the Clerk of Works department when these jerry-builds were being thrown up? They have a duty to see all work is structurally sound and build quality is to British Standards.A few questions should be asked about that side of things

    3. Agreed. I wonder who they were working for and how their best interests were served. My school must have been built in the late 19th century and is still in use. These have barely lasted 15 years!

    4. Ahaha we use sen (transliteration form cents) too. But if you say you have dua kupang (pronunciation: dwa coo.pung) you would impress a lot of Malaysians there. If you are ambitious you'd say it very fast an as a single syllable word dwa.oopung. That would really really impress a Malaysian. Anyway that is how we say up North.


  2. tris

    There two things certain in this life death and tax avoidance lol

    Someone mentioned it's not wot is on his tax return which is important
    It's what is not shown we need to know about,

    See Tom Harris over at the Torygraph says sneering at wealth
    Err no more at lack of leagality or morality for if Cameron is not
    Guilty of both he is of at least one.

    Poor old Tom having to serve his new/old masters attacking old friends in
    The Labour Party the things you have to as a Tory erse licker still Tom always
    Says he is a proud Blairite ,,,,,um just so

    Anon Helena pray tell about the snp Scottish futures trust and the difference
    If any with PFI ?

    1. I wish someone would show me how to avoid taxes!!

      Harris is actually quite sickening. Just such a Tory. If I were Corbyn I'd chuck him out.

      I don't approve of any way to get public services done, except we pay for them through taxes and the public sector builds them and runs them.

      Any notion about doing it off the books is just crazy.

      What the hell are these kids going to do? What are the teachers going to do? What a mess.

  3. David Cameron should be dead in the water. We might think that, fellow munguinites, but the spin is already in there.

    As annoying as it is, an SNP MP that claims a penny is on the front pages for yonks and 'enquiries' seem to never conclude, leaving doubt where none should exist.

    Yet this, this, will disappear as though it didn't happen. The voting public in England will be expected to ignore it. And they probably will.

    Which is why we need sites like yours.

    1. I was amazed, Douglas, at the BBC. The reporter with long blond hair (I don;t know her name) was utterly batting for Cameron when reporting on the march. And apparently Andrew Marr was doing the same thing.

      I don't know what the Sunday papers were like though not having seen any. After all the tabloids are paranoid about EU and are against Cameron because he is for staying in.

      In Iceland they can get rid of a prime minister who is a hypocrite really because he is just an ordinary Icelander, albeit a bit richer than Mr Average... In the UK however, with the state broadcaster on side and the class thing going on, the Eton boy is safe as houses.

      Once again than you for the compliment.

      I love the term "Munguinites". Munguin says it makes him feel a bit like Mrs Thatcher!!

    2. It suprises me not that the BBC is batting for an Eton boy. What right have we, mere plebs, to know about the tax affairs of our betters?

      As far as I know, this is the only site that loves orangutans and Scottish Independence equally!

      Thatcherites, Munguinites? Is Munguin happy or sad about the comparison?

      Personally I think he is a far better person.

    3. You have that in common with him Douglas!!!!

      Amazes me that the BBC can be so blatant in their support for him.

      Then I remember that the charter renewal is coming up and that's the job of the English culture secretary. Shame the Scottish Culture Secretary has no say. But then, who are we to be dictating to the BBC?

    4. I watched 3 of the 'on the hour' bulletins on BBC News channel on Sat pm. None even mentioned the protest outside 10 Downing st. (I'm guessing your comments, Tris, refer to Sunday?).
      Absolutely appalling. For what its worth I've written to the BBC to complain. Fat lot of good etc etc

    5. Yes, that's right Brian.

      You'll get no sensible reply from the BBC though.

      They don't want to upset Cameron. They are dependent for their licence fee on him.

  4. Going by the two items of apparel worn by the fragrant Samantha in the two photos above, she ain't getting much value for money,is she?

    1. You have a point, Hoots. I'm no expert on what would be classy for a woman of her stature to wear, but I've often though she looks a bit weird. Maybe that's her and not her clothes though.

      But then, as my mother pointed out recently, loads of them seem to have little taste. The last photo we saw of Tessy May had her showing what was an indecent amount of cleavage for business attire. And as Mum pointed out, at her age it might have been better to consider a round neck top!

      I know I found it embarrassing. I'd to look away!

      Thing is though, Hoots, as far as I'm concerned she can have a whole team of dressers to show her how to put on her socks...1, 2, 10, 500, as long as SHE and not WE pay for it.

    2. The only round neck top I'd like to see on Theresa May would be hemp, with a slip-knot.

    3. Wouldn't hear any complaints from us. But if she must go on appearing in public, business dress would be nice. It is demanded of men, and sometimes she looks like she's off to a sex party. Some of the other women look as if they are off to do some shopping.

      I couldn't care less what they wear, but equality works two ways. There remains a VERY strict dress code for men, while women care wear whatever. Why can't men go to work in t shirts?

  5. I find I don't need a personal dresser, as long as I don't get dressed in the dark.

    Sundays are really best for contemplating Orangs. And sleeping off Saturdays...


    1. I once went to work in a pair of trousers that had been washed and I'd remembered to iron one leg, but not the other one... I didn't notice till half way through the morning, so maybe I could do with a dresser.

      Do you think the government will stump up for me?

      Yep, Sunday's it simply doesn't matter what you wear. And Orangs are such a tonic... As for sleeping off Saturdays I'm sure I've no idea what you are talking about!!

      Incidentally, I just read over at Twitter that Charlie Saxe-Coberg-Gotha is in a bit of a bother about his Duchy of Cormwall.

      I wonder if his mum, who is the Duke of Lancaster for the purpose of getting free money from the state, is in the same bother?

      Tut tut.

    2. My wife buys all my clothes (with my money of course) but I still have to put them on myself in the morning.


      Perhaps I could apply for some taxpayer assistance re dressing.

      I'll ask the social work department, nice petite carer, blond if possible, that should do it.


    3. Nice try Gerry.

      You could ask the government if they will give you £53,000 (plus NI contributions) to employ your wife to continue in her role.

      Mine you you might end up, like mrs C, looking like you were wearing a bedspread from Home Bargains.

  6. Reference Edinburgh's schools, I was told on Saturday that the "owners" would not allow inspectors in to do full inspection as the buildings were "PRIVATE PROPERTIES". Teachers and Janitors were apparently were constantly reporting faults.
    Those PFI companies shouldn't get another penny, as someone said earlier nationalise the lot.

    1. Well QD, if that's true it's another nail in their coffins.

      Makes you wonder if there was a conspiracy between builders, owners and state to get them built quickly at the cheapest possible rates, and let someone else deal with the consequences later, so long as it looks good now.

      Funny how the Scottish press seem more interested in a secret deal that wasn't secret and that wasn't done, and a go between who wasn't.

      It was, I think Craig Murray who was advocating immediate nationalisation. I'm with him. If we have to clean up the mess, we need to own the buildings we have improved to habitable standards.

  7. I find it totally hypocritical of Cameron to spend so much money on telling us how great the EU is on the one hand but then lying to us about who was responsible for preventing the EU tarrifs when the Chinese dumped steel. Moreover HE is the one who wants to put rockets under TTIP.

    1. Yes. He also has been doing his best to stop the EU doing anything about corruption in the City; and his government refused help from the EU to fund the hungry, despite a million people+ dependent on food banks, and donations from ordinary people. Not ones that get £200,000 as a small gift from their mummies.

      I suspect that TIPP will happen whether or not we are in the EU. America wants it. Does anyone in their right mind think that the UK will argue?

  8. Maybe not the best week that he's ever had, but one of the best ones I've had recently.


    What a chump he is.

    1. It's been good for a laugh Gerry. No doubt. What a bunch of complete incompetents they are. And his only proper job was a Public Relations man... Hell's teeth, I bet that company is glad the Queen got him into politics.

  9. Very appropriate that Cam's company is called Blairmore. That's what you get with Dave - Blair more/More Blair. Another slippery shyster.

    1. Ha ha. I noticed that last night.

      I wonder, speaking of the war criminal, if he's going to let us know what kind of profits he's been making and how much tax he has paid on them, given that the money was made on the back of being a prime minister.

      Not that he's a public figure any more... but wait, he still gets royal protection squad 24/7 and a pension and a grant to pay for an office...

      So, on reflection, let's see your accounts Blair.

  10. I heard that Nigel Farage put his money in an offshore trust on the Isle of Man, and apparently made a loss.... The irony is he apparently complained at EU level about the Isle of Man's tax regime (it is , unlike Jersey and guernsey, in eh EU).

    Loads gonna come out now...