Wednesday 14 November 2012

FAIR AND BALANCED HEADLINE WRITING

One of the Daily Telegraph featured stories today (as at 22.42) was headlined:

RBS 'could quit an independent Scotland'

The under heading in large type read:

Royal Bank of Scotland's chairman has suggested the lender could consider moving from its Edinburgh headquarters if Scottish independence brought "extra difficulties".


The story actually is:

Asked whether the bank would look at where it is domiciled if Scotland voted for independence in 2014, he (Sir Philip Hampton) said: "The overriding requirement is to serve our customers and through that to produce the best value we can for shareholders. We have no intention or plan to relocate from Scotland."
He continued: "We are very happy and Scotland is a very effective place at the moment to do business.
"If, as a result of a vote for independence, we found extra difficulties or cost pressures or whatever arising from that, then we would have to think about alternatives.
"But we don't expect at the moment, we don't identify any clear rationale for making major domicile changes."
In short RBS could quit and independent Scotland (we can't quite see why the heading had quotes). At the same time the USA and Canada could become one country or Japan could kick out its emperor or Burma could declare war on Peru or Tris could be the next Prince of Monaco.
Each of these is possible; but none of them is likely. (Except the last one, which I am waiting to hear about any day!) 
The good old Daily Telegraph. Tabloid journalism with multi syllabic words.

28 comments:

  1. Now according to Darling if Scotland was Independent we couldn't of bailed out our banks funny that they seem to be private free flowing businesses. So either RBS or Darling are 'Bare faced liars' which is it? Don't ask the BBC by the way.

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  2. Hmmm, hard one.

    Darling has form.

    RBS has form.

    Ah... yeah, well everyone has form really.

    Maybe Auntie Johann will know the answer, especially if someone writes it down for her.

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  3. Tris,

    This was covered in the Hootsmon but the original head-line said that RBS would stay in Scotland and then it mysteriously changed to "RBS could leave Scotland". How blatant is that?

    Good luck in Monaco - don't forget my invite!!

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  4. So, in fact John, what the guy was saying was... if the conditions change (regardless of the country and who is running it), because we are a large international bank, operating in many different countries, we could move our head office.

    Big deal. That goes for every multi-national everywhere. It's not incredibly unlike HP Sauce moving its production to Holland, from England.

    I wonder why these papers found it necessary to make a scare story out of it.

    Maybe they are friends of Darlings?

    Oh, and by the way, the correct terminology is, "don't forget my invite, your serene highness". Not that I'm one to stand on ceremony!

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  5. If god forbid Scotland left our sacred union then all the biblical plagues of Egypt 'could' befall us all in terms of the debate .

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  6. Indeed Niko, perhaps you should mention that to Darling Alistair. His own imagination is bound to run dry at some time in the future.

    Remind me, what were these plagues?

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  7. One was a plague of frogs - you can't help in France feeling sorry for all these frogs hopping about on one leg.

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  8. Or with no legs at all John, (although clearly then they wouldn't be hopping, more dragging) ... There's not much eating in a thigh you know.

    Any idea what the other plagues are?

    Forewarned is forearmed.

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  9. terms of the debate .

    Labour seems to use 'attack the man' philosophy as debate is beyond there comprehension. The only plague I see is the increasing Independent supporters as the more vacuous reasons against are dismissed as nothing but assertions to keep the gravy train on track for a select few.

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  10. Boils, blood, locusts and firstborn but not sure about the rest; maybe bad neighbours?

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  11. Each time they do this more people start asking questions, this isn't putting people off, its making a lot of people actually engage in the argument.

    There is an interesting irony at play here, I've had more than a couple of people who were firm no's (because that was the default state for them) who are now yes' because they read this drivel, worry about it then ask if its actually true.

    No one likes being patronised or lied to and people generally do seem to prefer self-determination as opposed to whats on offer from Westminster.

    Meanwhile, Darling etc thinks they're scaring people into inaction when the exact opposite is true, people who otherwise didn't really care are being dragged in by the very fear-mongering the unionists are deploying to keep them in their place.

    Its actually quite brilliant.

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  12. Yeah Shame Alex has admitted to lying to the Scottish people puts your lots drivel in it place.


    Alex Salmond says sorry for using wrong college funding figures

    First Minister Alex Salmond has apologised to MSPs for using incorrect figures in relation to college funding.

    yep thats lying in old money


    Who's sorry now,

    Yeah the other day i met a coupls of dozen people on the omnibus and they said 'No one likes being patronised or lied to' so i says yeah well thats Alex for you and they said they were firm yes until they saw what a downright lying dog Alex has turned out to be.

    and now its yes to the UK for them all the way

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  13. Yes, they started all this scare stuff too early, Pa... If they'd got out all these silly things a couple of weeks before the referendum, it might have been slightly more effective.

    In the meantime, you really do wonder at them putting Darling in charge of anything except making the tea. It's not a risk I'd take.

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  14. Oh Niko... Alistair Darling will be coming round to give you a big hug. You just have to be his baby now.

    Margo said, all we had to do was convince one person. Well so far I've convinced 3, I think... and yesterday I put one (Anon, who was angry at me for criticising the Civil Service) off, so that's down to two.

    Whereas you are just sweeping them all before you.

    It must be your charm and wit... not to mention your looks and manly body what done it.

    So, has that Liberal blokey Alexander apologised for using up to date figures for rUK and 10 year old figures for Scotland.

    At least Alex, you say, appears to have apologised.

    :)

    Watch out for Darling. He's probably after your money. He's not been able to switch his main residence for simply AGES!

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  15. It would also be incapable of keeping pace with the Royal Navy's new aircraft carriers, which will be able to travel at more than 30 knots and need the submarines to protect them. One source told the Guardian the boat had a "V8 engine with a Morris Minor gearbox".

    I take that as a slur of Morris Minor and will consult solicitors on this!

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  16. Erm... what has CH?

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  17. Hell's teeth...

    I almost can't believe it. Then I remember that the MoD has never actually managed to buy anything at the right price that actually worked. (Remember the light bulbs that would have cost 50p in Morrison's that were £32?) And furthermore I remember that old Rear Admiral Hammond Organ is at the helm, and any hopes of them managing anything at all, disappear in a puff of smoke.

    So... now just supposing I bought a new car...nothing very posh or fancy, say a Toyota... and it didn't work right, and couldn't do the speed it was supposed to do and all that, I wouldn't expect to have to pay for it. Id make them send me a new one that did all the things that they had said it would do.

    It's just a thought.

    I mean it's not like they are cheap, is it...?

    Or did they manage to slip into the contract that, no matter what crap the company provides, the MoD will agree to accept it and pay the full whack, even if it sinks on its way to be delivered...

    It's just as well that Mr Osborne has sorted out the economy, and money is really no object.

    Oh wait... he erm didn't

    Tubes.

    Better together my butt.

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  18. Yes, the MOD will pay the full whack and in return all those involved will get lucrative company directorships.

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  19. Another non story scare story. My initial thought was, other than the people who work there in the offices, would anyone actually care if a bank and not a very good one was to leave Scotland.
    My other thought was that maybe this kinda thing is not too bad if it could lead to a debate on ethical banking and possibly the founding of an ethical bank in Scotland. I would use it.

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  20. There are two alternatives, the Co-op and a Swefish Bank, Handelsbanken at the moment but a Scottish version would be or rather should be a cornerstone of banking in an independent Scotland.

    Any thoughts of whether such a bank should not haves ay 33% held in trust for the Scottish people?

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  21. Met even more people wating for the omnibus. Convinced them of all the
    Love we have within our sacred union and glourious will our future together will be
    They all agreed with
    Much clapping etc ...... Unlike the omnibus conductor who threw me off for creating
    A disturbance. Snp members I'll e bound

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  22. All's well that ends well then, John.

    Mind you, would you want that idiot Hammond on your board?

    Still I suppose by that time he'll have changed his first name to Lord, and that always looks good on the headed paper!

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  23. I heard that there are to be a lot more Co-op bank branches opening, Bruce. Something to do with Lloyds,TSB, BoS having a monopoly some places.

    I'll move my overdraft there as soon as it happens. From what I've heard there will be a massive queue outside the door on the first day.

    As for RBS moving from Edinburgh... pfff. The bank took over Nat West and Williams and Glynn, and their REAL HQ is in London. They just hold on to their prestigious building in Edinburgh, to look good.

    Their profits...or losses are all recorded in England anyway.

    Anything that moves out would have to be replaced in any case as there is a need for banking in the country. And if head offices/control moving out of a country indicates anything, we should be aware that there aren't many British marques that are any longer British...

    Cadbury, Cross and Blackwell, Rowantree, Terry's, Jaguar, Rolls Royce... blah....



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  24. That's not a bad idea Wolfie. How do you see it working, representative wise?

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  25. Niko. What Alistair needs you to do is spend the next two years of your life getting on and off buses.

    That would mean he could stay at home (when I say home, I really mean homeS, that we paid for) and enjoy all the creature comforts that his wealth has brought him.

    Let you take the strain. By voting day, only people who never get on a bus will be voting YES.

    On the other hand Taz tells me he's gonna be standing outside voting places with a notice saying that he will bite everyone who votes to stay part of England.

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  26. Tris

    How would it work?

    I don't know but it seems to me that the wealth creation business has been outsourced from sovereign governments to banks which in turn fucked us over.

    It seems to me that such a central function within a country's wealth apparatus has have some sort of responsibility to the people from whom they derive their mandate. Sure Clyde Blowers help generate wealth but banks create the money which lubricates wealth creation and by that I mean making and selling stuff not shuffling IOUs around the World, buying them back and declaring a profit or lending uncontrolledly into an overheated housing market.

    How such a sovereign trust could be set up and separated for politicans, could you ever imagine Johann L or Iain Grey sending all the surpluses to London?

    Maybe it could be tied into a Scottish Sovereign Wealth Fund, like Norway, part of which would be held a shares in all banks trading in Scotland? Needs thinking through but could have some merit?

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  27. Yes, I see, Wolfie. Of course I was forgetting that we COULD ACTUALLY HAVE a Sovereign Wealth Fund...

    It certainly has merit.

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