Tuesday, 13 January 2015

Cameron's new slogan is about a country living within its means. What could go wrong?

I mean, what could possibly go wrong with a nice sensible slogan that suggests the country should live within its means....? 
Well Murphy's law states that what CAN go wrong WILL go wrong (OK, we know, but that's a laugh for another day) and after Die Straße in Deutschland, you'd have though that someone with the most expensive qualifications money can buy, in England, would have thought twice before spouting off... after all something might go wrong...
Like this, for a start. I mean, no one expects Mrs Mountbatten to get take visitors to McDonald's, or get the Co-op in to do something like Auntie Jessie's funeral tea, but come on, Liz, for a country with £1,500,000,000,000 of debt, this could hardly be said to be living within our means. 
Canapés and a glass of Asti Spumanti from Tesco at £32 a case is enough, surely, to stop them getting dehydrated.

Then there's this little beauty of a £13 million ski lodge being bought for Airmiles Andrew, perhaps in the hopes that he'll spend a little less time with teenage girls. No one knows how Billy Bunter and his ex wife could afford the money, given that she is permanently broke and pimping herself (or him) for cash, and he hasn't any money of his own, given that he spends everything he gets and has to get his mates to bail out the ex!

So the assumption has to be that his mother is forking out for it... and where does she get her money, remind me?

We should never forget that we are still punching well above our weight militarily. You'll remember how proud of that Cameron was when he came to Scotland to tell us that we wouldn't be able to afford to do that if we were independent. Assuming presumably that we'd all turned into public school oinks with an Empire fixation and would therefore want to!
We need to take into consideration too the replacement of the Nuclear Weapons that Blair admitted were only for show and prestige. That's £100,000,000,000 and counting. Heaven forbid we would lose any prestige. I simply couldn't stand the embarrassment, darling!

Of course we could also make a small saving here and there on Mr Pickles travelling expenses. His expenditure on private hire of cars has mounted to £500,000 in the last three years. What the hell has he been doing? Taking a world tour? 

It seems Mr Pickles doesn't like public transport. Or maybe it doesn't like him!
Still, the comforting news for Mr Cameron at least is that the English Health Service is cutting the number of cancer drugs that will be available to the public. That should put us back on the straight and narrow. It's pretty rotten news for English cancer patients but that's unlikely to concern that government much.
I'm sure too, that Her Majesty will ensure that we don't waste any precious money paying the fines of errant, elderly, overweight, playboys who enjoy over active sexual appetites.


  1. Tris

    Did a wee blog about some of posh boys comments yesterday, there will be a lot of pain but not as they know it. With the changes to pensions taking effect from April although the poverty payment won't filter through for a while and only if you have worked for 35 years will you even get the £150 a week, bloody hell does a zero hours contract even pay a pension contribution. I think we are going back to the Victorian Age and it's going to take a revolution to change things, but given how much people just don't care Cameron will be living on Bransons Island before people take a fucking notice of what is happening around them.

    Bet NO voters are proud, at least they have liar Murphy.


    1. Brilliant blog Bruce.

      Bang on. It is time to say: "stop. We are not going to live in this fairy tale land any more."


    2. Well said Bruce. I tend to think their intentions are further back then good old Queen Vicky, somewhere just before the Black Death would suit them fine. You see as soon as there were not enough workers to keep them fed they actually had to start paying the Serfs and they have hated it ever since.
      I see Morrison's Supermarket had a bad Christmas, along with all the rest, except for Lidl and Aldi. How can we put this when people are getting their Dinners supplied courtesy of the local Food Bank and those managing to eat have not had a decent pay rise, what do they expect. Can they not join up the dots?

    3. Simple truth is that Lidl and Aldi offer good quality for less money... up to 25% less.

      I once read that in Europe, supermarkets aim to have a 2% profit; in America and Australia they are aiming at 1%. In the UK 5%.

      I don't know if that's true, but it certainly feels like it.

      I've no sympathy for these companies Tesco, Morrisons, Asda, Sainsbury... and the Co-op which is more expensive that Waitrose.

      Greed is what motivates them.

  2. do as I say, not as I do

  3. How's your cold PP? Gone I trust!

    You'd have thought that this would have disappeared with the deferential 50s, wouldn't you? But no, we still accept that it's one life for them and one for us.

    What a joke of a country.

    1. I blame Walt Disney and all his Princesses and Queens. Then we have them as the ultimate celebrity and worshipped by those who think they could join them.
      Makes you weep.

    2. You could be right. They paint a picture that people keep in their heads.

      Of course, the adoration in the press over the years of people like Diana and now Middleton, and I suppose in the past the spoilt brat Margaret, add to the glorification of them as "celebrities" which, as we all now know, is the aspiration of half the population to become.

  4. Is it just me Tris, or is the *ahem* message behind oor Dave just a wee kick in the direction of oor Ed? After all we all know that oor Ed will be borrowing loads more dosh ... allegedly if he gets his hands on the keys to number 10.

    I think maybe you are being a wee bit harsh on oor Eric here Tris. I mean I'm sure I heard he has gone on a new diet fetish, it's called a seefood diet ... if he sees food he eats it! LOL

    1. Undoubtedly who it's aimed at, Arbroath...

      The way Dim Jim is going, I have the feeling he'll need to double his mansion tax to pay for Scotland's nurses...

      Now you made me feel all guilty about poor old Eric. He's such a nice man too.

    2. tris

      seeing as the snp wish to take Scotland back to the dark age of FREEDOM !
      the Victorian era in comparison would seem like an earthly paradise

      As for Mr pickles i understand the vehicle he is transported about in has to
      be specially strengthened, due health and safety weight limits

      Although the snp are on a sticky one with that I mean Alex is also
      being chauffeured everywhere at great expense . taken no doubt from all
      the new members joining up fees................
      not sure that was the expected outcome for their taking the snp
      oath of loyalty..bit of a rum do if you ask me

    3. Ah Niko... just think, a few more months and you won't be worrying about Victorian grinding poverty. The New Lower Pension may affect you though when the time comes.

      I've already said elsewhere that I don't approve of people being chauffeured, frankly even when they are in office, never mind afterwards. These people work for us; they are nothing special regardless of party. I'm damned if I can understand why they can't take the bus. Although I suppose that most of them would end up strung up if they went anywhere near people they are starving to death. To be fair Salmond's car is provided from party funds (I disapprove of) while War Criminal Blair is paid by us to set up an office, has a pension, and a fund for carrying out public duties (which he never does) and gets 24 hour protection from the royal protection squad no matter where he is in the world, making money from other murders and dictators. I hardly think tat labour is in a place where it can complain much.

    4. Niko, where did you get your information, some Tory site I expect. If Alex is getting chauffeured about how do you know he is not paying?
      I have no intention of arguing with a hypocrite but I have to ask where were all the other Red Tories this afternoon, you know the ones who want to help the poor, could it be that they could only get 28 out of the bar or perhaps the other lot were filling in their usual expense forms. Do not come the ham laddie, you were arguing about a coalition with the Tories, seems Labour may be considering this deeply.

    5. Helena

      have a read for yerself


      An SNP spokesperson said: "Security assessments for the former First Minister are a matter for Police Scotland, not the SNP.

      "The former First Minister has no access to the government car service, in contrast to former Prime Ministers and a number of other UK government ministers.

      "Therefore, his transportation, including to party events, has no impact at all on the public purse."


      Given the snp have been found out hiding £444 million from the Scottish people which could of been used to help the Scottish people. And which was deliberately hidden so the snp could point to suffering Scots and say
      it wuz the Tories wot dun it..............and all the time knowing they had
      ample funds to help but with malice aforethought hid it away

    6. Malice aforethought? - An attempt to create a wealth fund to prepare for the savage cuts coming Scotland's way. At least they are saving an actual underspend and not returning it to Westminster like labour did.

      Try and remember that its an "underspend" Niko, and it will have to be rationed carefully...like continuing to pay the bedroom tax ransom among other things.

      We know you hate the SNP. We get that. But its a democracy which means, we are not obliged to agree. If you want us to vote labour, then labour must put its case before us. If we do not like what we hear, we are perfectly entitled to vote for someone else. That's how it works.

      Given the behaviour of labour to date, I see a party of losers, not winners. I look at Miliband and I don't see a man who will stand up for Britain. He does not engender trust in me. I don't trust his politics. I don't trust his cabinet. I certainly don't trust the Scottish branch of the party.

      Your constant one man attacks on the SNP are as tiresome as they are disingenuous. You cannot make your case while you are insulting everyone and the choices you make.

    7. I have to say James that I look at Labour today and apart from a few really genuine people, I see a bunch of not very bright chancers.

      Some may be street-wise, but that's where the wisdom ends.

    8. Niko.

      Having a contingency fund is surely a sensible idea.

      When Labour was in power it had an underspent too. This was sensible, in case something came up... after all if you have a government that is not allowed to borrow, you have to have something in reserve in case there is an emergency.

      Unfortunately, given your "helping the people of Scotland" rant there, mr McConnell sent the money back to England. In case they needed something extra, like another helicopter for the royals, or some more vintage champagne for the lords.

  5. Glad to say cold finally gone but it was probably flu since the virus mutuated and the vacinne wasn't offering full protection according to reports.

    Talking about protecting folk, Pete Wishart MP for SNP tweeted 515 MPs voted for austerity today versus 18 against. Eighteen, ffs.

    28 Red Tories in SLAB included in the 515 and he plans to post the offending names later. Wonder if my MP was one of them? By which I mean was St Jim of the halo first in the queue.

    1. Glad to hear you're better. I reckoned it was more than a cold!

      I would think that Dim was probably one of the Torylites (or do I mean troglodytes) who voted to hurt poor people while allowing the rich to continue their uninterrupted lifestyle of greed and excesses.

      (I mean sorry does Fat Boy actually NEED a £13,000,000 ski lodge in Switzerland?)

    2. For a school for wayward young ladies?


    3. So far (on Twitter feed) we have the names of Greatrix and Hood voted for the Tories' austerity plan.

  6. LOL Conan... the fat one would like that... He could invite his friends to give classes.

    1. PS... what is the Murdo story about... something I missed?

  7. When will the sheeple, wake up and not stand for the abuses of power?

  8. Replies
    1. Wouldn't surprise me. Their joint austerity plans for everyone at the lower levels, together with their determination to have WMDs at all cost, and to fight wars in the Middle and Near East; their disregard for the poor and sick and disabled and their desire to privatise and let their friends make money out of all manner of suffering means that you really can't tell the difference.

      They may as well stop fighting and get hitched.

    2. They walked into the lobby arm in arm to vote for £30 billion of cuts to welfare lets hope they both die together in May.

    3. Repugnant. £30 billion. What do they want? Poor people just to die?

  9. Woohahahaha
    Murphy woke up next to a pig
    and we know what they say about that children dont we?

  10. Oh dear...

    As always, the comments on the Telegrph as more inmformative of the mood than the articles which are pretty crap.

    The job, Cochers, that Murphy has to do, to win seats and get people to back Labour in Scotland, is to persuade traditional (Glasgow mainly) Labour voters that Labour is not the party of the bankers, Tony Blair, wars and making obscene money.

    Over the period of the referendum we saw that people liked the idea of a more egalitarian Scotland... In some minds Scotland now equates with that notion of old fashioned Labour, working for the workers, and the UK, well it is all about corrupt establishments, bankers, wars, Blair, bent police, bent MPs, bent Lords, bent press, and more...

    He doesn't mean what he says, Cochers. Not a word. He will say what it takes to get himself made First Minister. Then he will will be happy.

    He's absolutely without principle.

    As for the comments on the page, I'm again force to believe that vast swathes of the English seem to dislike Scotland and Scots with a passion, and believe that they keep us afloat.