Saturday, 10 October 2015


Dear Peregrin,

I believe we’re on the brink of something special in our country. (Abyss?)

This year, we’ve seen more people in work than at any time in our history; more of our children starting university than ever before; more British entrepreneurs setting up shop than anywhere else in Europe. You didn't feel obliged at this point to mention that there are record numbers of people going to foodbanks, or that this is likely to skyrocket once your cull of the working poor begins?

Wages are rising. (For MPs?) Hope is returning (For the Lords?) We’re moving into the light. (Spelt with an "sh" rather than an "l"?)

But we’re not there yet. We’re only halfway through. (Yippee!)

We can make this era – these 2010s – a defining decade for our country: the turnaround decade. (Well we are half way through them and all you have done so far is spread misery and disillusionment. Are you going to turnaround that?)

And our goal is a Greater Britain. (There we differ. Greater isn't something most of us aspire to. Our aim here is a better Scotland. Hopefully you can have a better Britain, but why do you want it to be greater?)

With strong defence and a strong economy. (Ah, I see the defence comes first?)

An NHS that there’s for everybody (you have a funny way of achieving that, leaving the part of the health service that you control in the hands of Jeremy Hunt. You are aware he's flogging it off to his mates, aren't you? You'll be lucky if it's there at all in a few years), and schools that stretch our children (you're bringing back the rack?).

And over the next five years we will show that the deep problems in our society are not inevitable. (You've spent the last 5 years showing that they are inevitable, indeed building on the ones that Blair and Brown left and creating new ones.)

That a childhood in care doesn’t have to mean a life of struggle. (You mean you're actually going to do something about the perverts, becasue so far that really hasn't been happening?)

That a stint in prison doesn’t mean you’ll get out and do the same thing all over again. (How are you going to do that? So far your policies have failed dismally. 'Prison works' simply created a lot of well informed criminals, with almost no chance of getting a decent real job on release.)

That being black, or Asian, or female, or gay doesn’t mean you’ll be treated differently. (Dream on Dave. Theresa just made a barnstorming speech stirring up racial tensions and your party is chock full of racists and homophobes.)

A Greater Britain – made of greater expectations. (We have loads of expectations, Dave. You just fail to fulfil them for anyone except your sharp elbowed friends.)

Where renters become homeowners, employees become employers, a small island becomes an even bigger economy, and where extremism is defeated once and for all. (Hellish difficult to have a mortgage on temporary contracts, zero hour contracts, minimum wage, when you go into your house purchase with university debts of £50,000. You do know that there are people like that in Britain, don't you?  And defeating terrorism is not best done by getting involved in, and making a mess of, yet another middle eastern country.)

A country raising its sights, its people reaching new heights (of debt?).

A Greater Britain – made of greater hope, greater chances, greater security. (We've covered this already, but to reiterate.... Half the population has no hope at all, and you're making that number bigger by the day. Large groups of decent hard-working people think of the state as an enemy, and so it is as it takes away hard won rights and impoverishes. What hope do you see anywhere? Do you ever get outside Chipping Norton? And greater security? Don't make me laugh. Your constant wars whether they are on Middle East countries or the working classes, make this country ever less secure.)

So let’s get out and make it happen. (Whatever, Dave, just whatever.)

Please contribute to our campaign today, and together we can build that Greater Britain.   (Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.)


Friday, 9 October 2015


Mrs May's speech at the Tory Party Conference was nothing to do with the facts of immigration. Indeed most of what she spouted had already been disproved in papers her own department (a notoriously disorganised, out of control, left hand and right hand uncoordinated organisation) had published.

Even an article in the Telegraph (no lover of foreigners) from a couple of years ago, had admitted that rather than being a drain on our society's resources, immigrants were of net economic value to the country.

Indeed whether middle England likes it or not, we must have immigrants to sustain any kind of economic balance in the future, as the baby boomer generation moves into old age and beyond, living ever longer but without the ability to make positive economic contributions. 

The NHS, which will be in much demand by this group in the next 30 years or so, is particularly dependent upon immigrant doctors and nurses. 

Germany has recognised this as is demonstrated by its willingness to absorb large numbers of refugees from the Middle East, out of economic necessity rather than altruism.

People may not like foreigners moving into their country, but we suspect that they will like the alternative even less.

But no, Mrs May's speech was nothing to do with truth. It was much more to do with pitching her candidacy for the leadership of the Tory party when the Eton boy stands down. 

There is a growing list of candidates waiting to step into the expensive hand made shoes of Cameron. The usual suspects of course: Mad Boris, the eccentric Englishman, Gideon the coke man, Sajid Javid (a rising star), Elizabeth Truss (a second Thatcher), Philip Hammond (a remedy for insomnia), Graham Brady... (who he?) and the extremely unlovely Priti Patel, Grim Reaper Duncan Smith's underling at the DWP.

I've even heard it suggested that the Grim Reaper may make another attempt at the top job, however given the failure of his last foray into leadership I suspect that that is wandering into the realms of fantasy. Still, in a party which thought Michael Howard was a potential prime minister, who knows!

With today's announcement of a very well funded, big name supported, cross party organisation to fight against the government for Brexit, (rather than the shambolic, accident prone, Farage led, campaign we were expecting),  it may well be that Cameron's days of entertaining at Chequers (as he is today) will be over even sooner than he thought. 2017 ring a bell?

So which of these beauties will be the next leader of the Tories, and the prime minister of the UK? There's a poll in the right hand side bar. Let us know who you think will be leader.

PS: For those who are interested in this sort of thing, it is Cameron's birthday today. More interestingly it's John Lennon's birthday. The difference is that the internet is full of wise things John Lennon said while it's full of stupid things David Cameron said.

Happy birthday John.

Monday, 5 October 2015


We are expecting a massive coverage of this story, because, as you know, when there is a hint of impropriety in Scottish politics, proof or none, the papers are on it like a rash making it front page news for I'm sure you'll all remember that you read it here first... (although Munguin found the story in the Edinburgh Evening News.

Briefly, it seems that around 18 months ago a sum of £10,000 went missing from a Labour Party constituency office in Edinburgh Eastern constituency, where Kezia Dugdale intends to stand in the General Election in 2016.
Kezia is pinning her hopes on winning Edinburgh Eastern
The local membership has been worried for some time about the lack of published audited accounts, and most recently because the branch office holders and the party have been investigating the disappearance of this money for some time with no result.

The branch treasurer has been suspended while they carry out an investigation into the money's disappearance, as would be normal in these circumstances. It must be of considerable worry to her that the problem has dragged on, and obviously the members are starting get concerned about money for the election campaign.

They have written to the party, but received a reply saying that there was a delay in getting reports from the bank and other organisations. Of course I can understand this, banks are busy places, but a delay of 18 months? Surely, you'd think, if the bank manager realised that there was a possibility that the money had gone missing, he could and would expedite the requisite paperwork pretty swiftly?

The party's reply went on to say that progress had been made in recent weeks and that a report would soon be ready with recommendations for the future conduct of local party finances. But still nothing about the £10,000.
Note to self: Irn Bru gives you yellow teeth. Avoid!
So, dismayed with the lack of serious progress into the disappearance of the cash, some of the local members have contacted the police.

Clearly £10,000 is a large sum for a local branch of a party. 

It is essential that the money be found as quickly as possible so that they can fund their campaign for Kezia's election.

As we said, it is likely that this will be the top story on 'Reporting Jackie' and in all the papers for the next few weeks, so we won't need to keep you updated.


Some times when you see articles about the governance of the UK, you wonder if you are reading a plot outline for an episode of "The Thick of it".

And today was one of these days.

Let's start with Liam Fox (yes him... the one who resigned in disgrace over his friendship with Mr Werrity. A relationship in which he allowed his young friend access to top secret information, the run of the MoD, a card which announced him as a representative of the Secretary of State (although he was not), and included him confidential meetings with top level foreign representative, mostly Israeli, including visits abroad at our expense, all to the horror of the officials at the MoD).

Stuart has already pointed out Fox's commentary on the Scotland situation. Apparently, according to old Foxy, had we voted to leave this glorious union, we would have found ourselves in "a bit of a pickle" because of the collapse in oil prices. A lie of course, but it sounds convincing to the uninitiated as part of the steady anti-Scottish drip drip drip.... 

Fortunately, however, you'll be happy to hear that we didn't leave so we are all living in clover; we've never had it so good... after all we'll be at war shortly, always good for business; "hard-working" families "up and down the country of S******d are losing an average of £1,300 in tax credits; our budget has been cut yet again; we are about to lose the right to strike; European human rights are about to be replaced by English ones (God help us); getting sick or becoming unemployed has become a tragedy on the scale of the black death (ie likely to lead to death)... and that's just for starters.

So now Foxy, almost unbelievably only 54 years old, having amassed a tidy little fortune for himself, has advised the government that it must cut benefits further, and that these cuts must be for keeps. He says too, that now is the time to do it, when there is a broken opposition...although he fails to mention that it might have been a good idea to have done it when there was NO opposition... ie a few weeks ago when Labour failed to join the SNP, Greens and Plaid to vote down further cuts. (Still, his type love having a go at Jeremy, and why let mere facts get in the way?)

He was joined in this appeal to the government by the chairman of the Taxpayers' Alliance, Alex Wild, who said that now was the time to make cuts to pensioners' benefits, after all, many of them wouldn't be around at the next election, and those who were would probably have forgotten who cut their benefits.

Of course it's true... Many older people have voted in their last election, and some will, over a period, not remember which set of incompetent spivvy bastards cut the benefits, given that there is very little between Labour and Tory policies on the subject. Both have voted for draconian cuts for the less well off.

I don't shrink from the fact, because a fact it certainly is that people die.

Indeed, I've cited demographics as a reason that a further independence referendum in 5 years' time would be more likely to produce a Yes vote. A lot of the older people who predominant voted for status quo will be dead... There I've said it. We all know it's true.

But has it occurred to Foxy and his friend, Wild, that not all older people will have died or forgotten? Some of them will have suffered, and as we all know, older people tend to vote.

Many folk, young and old, remember now, for example the fact that Fox himself was sacked for his crass stupidity, risking the nation's security with his young friend. That was a good while ago in 2011. (He didn't last long, did he?)

Additionally, the relatives of the recently deceased, or very forgetful elderly, who have had to cope with their grand parents', parents', uncles', aunt's, reduction in circumstances, will be still be there, and still voting?

In addition to not being very nice, they seem to be less than terribly bright.

Sunday, 4 October 2015


So, excitingly for Brits, today saw the start of their Tory Party Conference in Manchester, England. 
Given that the government is so popular with ordinary hard working people up and down the country, it attracted a lot of attention from their adoring public. People were queuing across the streets to congratulate the likes of Jeremy Hunt for expertly steering the English Health Service through these difficult times and straight into a ditch.
They were clearly overwhelming supportive of the trades union legislation which will see it become almost impossible to strike, no matter what your employers do to you, and the welfare reforms which are not too slowly but very surely killing off the old, the sick and the vulnerable.
So popular have the policies of the Tory Party been that the delegates had to be shut in behind steel barriers and warned not to go out of the hotel wearing anything that would identify them as being Tories.  Still they were getting the booze in just in case they they are marooned. 
On the rooftops there were police marksmen with rifles trained on the great unwashed. Just like the London Olympics. I was looking around for one of their new drones, now that Cameron has decided summary execution forms part of his powers.
There was much mirth as the lowly common people enjoyed recounting the jolly stories of the somewhat naughty activities of their betters who had been at Eton and Oxford and taken part in weird sexual rituals way beyond the understanding of your ordinary hard working family man or woman.

This is the Tory government that was elected only 5 short months ago, as proudly boasted by the Telegraph, albeit with a pretty small majority, on the votes of 27% of the eligible population.

I'd not like to see the security they will need when they come to their party conference in 2019!
Just thought here it would be nice to see a little photograph of our Nicola, our head of government, visiting one of our northern cities and compare it with Cameron visiting one of theirs.

I look forward to our Tory Party Conference. I do hope that it won't cause the same disruption to one of our towns.

Saturday, 3 October 2015

Friday, 2 October 2015


You might have thought that the one word the Daily Mail would be able to spell correctly would be "xenophobe".

Sadly not.

I wonder if Carphone Warehouse is having busy morning explaining to hopeful buyers that the Mail just got it wrong again. 

Tuesday, 29 September 2015


Oh look, Scotland almost makes an appearance.
Just that little bit run by Theme Park Fluffy
 for the Huntin', Fishin', Shootin' brigade.
Sale of the Century
Actually it's more like the White Elephant Stall at the Church Jumble.
Any old garbage not yet sold going cheap to rich folks.
How VERY unfortunate Govey. Trust you to be seen with a pig!
Still, if it had to be someone, I guess you were made for it.
Oh dear... Tell me it's not true.

Anyone know where I can get Coke around here?
Have you ever seen so much money wasted on such bad taste?
I mean if I were as rich as the Queen, I think I'd have a better class of oily spiv to tea.
Maybe Mags. Conservatives never seem to run out of other people's money though.
Bang on there, Charlie!
I think we will be laughing at Pigate for as long as we laughed at Major and his underpants, or indeed his nights in with a good Currie. But is it true. Did Cameron take £8,000,000 for a seat in the Lords and a job in the cabinet knowing all about  Mr Ashcroft's tax situation?
Thanks Dave, you lying git.
Honorary Tory, admired by Thatcher and Cameron alike.
Maybe George should try another recreational substance, cause things certainly aren't going better with Coke.

Sunday, 27 September 2015


Grateful thanks to Panda Paws for pointing out this video. I can do no better than offer the information contained on the Youtube original.

ALTERED STATE: Reflections on Scotland's First Independence Referendum. Part 1 How to Steal a Country in 10 Days reflects on the conduct of the BBC and HM Treasury during Scotland's Independence Referendum during the final days of the campaign; organisations both bound to strict codes of impartiality. 

Was the last minute reintroduction of the 'Devo Max' offer a clear breach of the Edinburgh Agreement and a cynical attempt to split the pro-independence vote? Did HM Treasury deliberately collude with the BBC during the illegal RBS leak of market sensitive information to damage the economic case of the Yes campaign? Watch and make up your own mind. 

This episode includes interviews with Derek Bateman, Professor John Robertson, Paul Kavanagh (Wee Ginger Dug) and Christopher Silver.

Derek Bateman

Wee Ginger Dug's New Book is now available for order:
Send your order request to and Paul will email you with details on how to make payment. You can pay by Paypal, bank transfer, cheque or cash. Signed copies of both volumes are available for a special price of £20 plus £4 P&P within the UK.

Professor John Robertson's latest research Scotland’s Propaganda War: The Media and the 2014 Independence Referendum is now free to view:

Christopher Silver's new book 'The Case for a Scottish Media' is due for release.

Saturday, 26 September 2015