Thursday 24 December 2015

JUST FOR A LAUGH

Terrible these days the way people sit there on their phones or iPads, never speaking to each other...
Sounds like him.
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. 

The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" 

The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to intrude on your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" 

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife's first husband."
A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:

Man: What's the problem officer?

Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone.

Man: No sir, I was going 65.

Wife: Oh Harry. You were going 80.

(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)

Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light.

Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!

Wife: Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks.

(Man gives his wife a dirty look.)

Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt.

Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car.

Wife: Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt.

Man: Shut your mouth, woman!

Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way?

Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

Jeez, if I had his hair I wouldn't fall out with a wind farm.






8 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for the really good laugh, between this, William Duguid, Chris Cairns I am having a really nice Christmas Eve.
    Have a lovely Christmas Tris, and Munguin, eat as much as you can stomach drink the cabinet dry, then sober up and go on a diet, well that is what I am doing. Happy New Year too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL Helena. Munguin says i can have an extra Irn Bru tomorrow, if I'm good... after i've served his lunch.

      Have a good one.

      Delete
  2. Fellow Munguinites, have a good Christmas. Thanks for the laughs as I needed cheering up though Helen's is right Messers Cairns and Duguid were good too.

    I'll raise a glass to you all. And hope that despite the holidays, Sunday will be as Soppy as ever. After all Tris complains Munguin never let's him have any time off!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Indeed they were.

      Munguin can confirm that there will be a deal of soppiness on Sunday, just like any other week.

      Munguin doesn't believe in staff holidays (except for himself).

      Delete
  3. Thanks for everything during 2015 and hope you have a peaceful time over the festive season.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for your support... We'll do another little post ion a while to tide us over Christmas.

      I hope you have a good and peaceful time too :¬)

      Delete
  4. Merry Christmass to everyone, especially those who can't make it home to be with family for whatever reason.
    Have a great day everyone.

    ReplyDelete