DODGY DAVE

It's a funny old world, isn't it?

One in which when the SNP clap in Westminster, it is wrong and disrespectful and Mr Speaker gets quite schoolmarmish about it and tells then that while they may have meant well, they haven't yet been in England long enough to understand the different way they do things...properly. 

So whilst it is not considered bad manners to boo and roar and wave papers in the air and behave like a bunch of 6 year olds whose teacher has popped out of the room for a second, it is extremely bad manners, uncouth and beastish to clap...as one might do at, say, the opera.

Then a few weeks later when a some members stick a knife in Willie Hague's back while he is trying to stick one in the back of the Speaker, on Cameron's orders, and the Speaker comes out smiling, while Willie Hague's last act in the House of Commons is to be resoundingly humiliated, it suddenly has become good manners to clap and all is well in the world.

And it seems to stay like that. Because not long after that Blairite Hilary Benn makes a warmongering speech, going against his party leader's stance on war in Syria (one we can neither afford nor win), it's all Tory hands to the clap again. Note, it's the last few minutes of the video that you'll want, containing clapping and the embarrassing praise from Hammond of Benn's speech. The rest is too awful for words.

Now Munguin isn't a betting animal but he reckons a pound to a pinch of snuff that if the SNP try clapping again, it will have reverted to boorishness, and not the behaviour expected of gentlemen of the Hon, Rt Hon, Learned or Gallant persuasion.

So it shouldn't come as any great surprise to any of our readers that when David Cameron insulted Dennis Skinner a few months ago by telling him he could take his pension at any time, and indeed he advised him to do so, rude and ungentlemanly behaviour to a man with more experience than Mr Cameron will ever have, and who is old enough to be Cameron's father, nothing was said about it.

 And he has form. Here he called Mr Skinner a dinosaur.

However, when Mr Skinner said that Dave was dodgy, an understatement of mammoth proportions in anyone's terms (given that he clearly lied all week about his gains from offshore investments), Skinner was told to retract, and when he refused,  to leave the chamber.

Rather like the subject of the business, there seems to be one rule for some, and one rule for the rest.

Does anyone seriously think that Dave isn't dodgy? or the Commons corrupted?

REMEMBER WHEN LABOUR GOT THE BLAME FOR ALL THE IMMIGRATION?

Well, yes, you probably do.

Because we heard over and over again how they let anyone and everyone in in the hopes that they would all be poor and vote Labour.

Well it seems, according to ex Liberal Democrat Minister David Laws, (as revealed in his book) that the Tories aren't any different. The Foreign Secretary suggested a Schengen visa. And Cameron said he would fire anyone who leaked it. 

But Mr Laws is no longer fireable... and in any case, he is a Liberal Democrat and this can only do the Tories harm, so it's win win for him: sells the book and gives the Tories some grief.

Thinks: "Will I *dob the Tories in to the press, or...will I dob them in by writing a book?"

The Home Office, whose priorities are set by ministers, seem not to be overly interested in migration. No wonder they make such a mess of it.

Not been a good week for the Tories. First we find that while they have been blaming the EU for not standing against Chinese steel imports, the truth of the matter is that they have been blocking German, French and Italian efforts to curb the influx in order not to upset the Chinese. Embarrassing.

Now we find that they didn't make immigration a priority and wanted to be in Schengen, despite making it an election promise to drastically reduce the number of immigrants.

Seems to me you can't much trust them.

* For non-Scots readers, the verb 'to dob in' means 'to inform on'.

POOOOOOR ELAINE. HOW WILL SHE COPE?

I can't remember how much MSPs get as a wage, but I'm sure that Ms Smith would have been able to find money for bagpipe tuition had it not been provided by the state.

But aside of that, Ms Smith raises a good point. And to be fair Labour has been consistent in their complaining about this sort of thing over a concerted period. They have pointed out over and over that there are fewer courses being run by colleges or funded by the Scottish government at school. 

Possibly bagpipe tuition is among those to go. I understand that there are fewer courses on home crafts and flower arranging, basket weaving, conversational Portuguese, Latin for beginners, and other such things. .

No one wants to see these courses go. But year on year since the 2007 election when Labour ceased to be the senior party in a coalition that ran Scotland but remained in charge of finances in London, there has been a reduction in the Scottish budget. The Scottish government has received less and less money to provide services

And we've been lumbered with an assortment of costs trying to alleviate the worst effects of Mr Osborne's crazy drive to save money that should be spent on ordinary people. 

Not that Scotland has particularly been earmarked for punishment. It hasn't. All of Britain is broke. We are all in this together. Everyone is suffering...well, when I say everyone, I don't exactly mean EVERYONE.

At the time of the crash Britain's economy was in a catastrophic state. Of course it wasn't alone. The USA, Iceland, Ireland and to a lesser extent continental Europe, all suffered, with knock on problems for others. 

The banks were broke and, having made massive profits as privatised companies, were now seeking to socialise their monumental losses (and were allowed to by Brown and Darling).

Personal credit had been allowed to run riot and people owed astounding amounts on a variety of credit and charge cards, paying exorbitant interest rates into the black hole of bank insolvency. 

The price of houses had reached the stage where only prince Charles could afford to buy one (despite him living in subsidised state housing), so mortgages were a gigantic debt, made all the worse that they had been a spate of remortgaging so that people could live the high life on borrowed money, with the sure and certain knowledge that house prices would continue to rise until a one-roomed flat cost a cool billion!!!

Then CRASH. It all fell down. What a surprise! And although, as I say, it wasn't all Britain's fault, and it wasn't all Labour's fault, some of it, a fair bit, was.

That was when, if I remember rightly, that it was decided by the powers that be, that we were all in it together. We all had to show Dunkirk spirit and fight to save our country. Well, some of us did anyway. 

Bankers of course did not lose out in this Dunkirkian effort. Nor did the politicians or officials who had overseen (or rather failed to oversee) the chaos.
And royals and lords continued to live just as they had done before. Indeed over the period from then till now MPs have received a massive pay increase. The Queen and her heir have had large rises in their various sources of income. The prime minister has got himself a private jet and prince William now has a helicopter. All in it together, Aye!!

But the ones who ARE all in it together have found that there is less money for social security, police, schools, courts, health, roads, transport, colleges, universities, etc, etc. And of course for the smaller countries of "our united kingdom", as Cameron keeps on irritatingly referring to it, we get less money in block grant from Big Brother.

Erm.... what?

For all we are a broke little country, however, there has been no dismantling of that status symbol of big rich countries, the independent nuclear deterrent, which of course, as we have discussed before, is neither independent nor a deterrent. (Well the USA didn't find it much of a deterrent when the Twin Towers and the Pentagon were bombed; France didn't find it much help back in November, and 7/7 came and went despite the presence of nukes only 500 miles away. And it's not independent because the idea that the UK would [even if it could] use it without permission from America, is completely laughable.)

Nope, it's sole purpose as far as most of us (except Jackie Baillie) can see, is it makes the British government look very big and important in the world. Jackie seems to think that it provides thousands and thousands of jobs for her constituents, but she lives in a fantasy world.

Austerity isn't for rich people.  It doesn't become them. Elaine Smith might have to pay for her son's bagpipe tuition, but she'll cope.  Austerity is for people on the dole; on low wages; on zero hour contracts. 

And austerity hasn't worked, no matter what Osborne tells you. All it's done is smack the already disadvantaged in the face... We know because you can hardly help but know, that there are people who have had their benefits stopped because it was reckoned they were skivers... just as their lives were ending in a hospital bed. And people with too many rooms in their council flat becasue someone went to uni, or died have had to fork out (although not in Scotland) or be evicted despite there being nowhere else to go. People have committed suicide becasue of the misery and shame of living as part of Cameron's underclass.

The stories are too many to retell here. But we can find them all on the net.

And Labour's answer is to this austerity isn't to stop interfering in wars in the Middle East; it isn't to get rid of the WMDs; it's not to demand that companies like Google pay some taxes or that royals live in ONE palace instead of six.

It is rather, that the poor and 'just getting by' pay extra tax, and that the very well off pay 5p extra on earnings over £150,000. It comes with the promise that they will arrange a possibly illegal, and in any case horrifically expensive and complex, system of repayments to the very poor, for which, I add, they will have to fill in forms and present confirmation that they are indeed poor, then lose tax credit and pay tax on their tax rebate (that isn't a tax rebate, honest Mr O)

As Stuart has pointed out, this tax rise won't even cover the costs of the improvements they wish to make to education (which I thought they were going to fund by not reducing airport tax [and thereby creating 2000 jobs]). 

What WOULD cover the costs of the education improvements, however, including Ms Smith's laddies' bagpipe lessons, would be scrapping bloody Trident.

Finally, could someone close to her please  see if they can talk Baillie into realising that really there are very few jobs in Trident. 

I don't know about you, but I'd rather not live next to weapons that Portsmouth thought too dangerous to site in their back yard, and if we got rid of it, I'm sure that in the millions we would save every year there would be sufficient to revitalise the area!

B IS FOR BAHRAIN, BLOODY, AND BAD

One of the Middle East's more repulsive regimes is that of Bahrain. it, along with Saudi Arabia, is reputed to be funding the utterly ruthless ISIS...that's the ones that Dave now thinks he wants to go to war with. Incidentally that's interesting becasue the last time he wanted to go to war in Syria it was against Assad, who is currently fighting ISIS. 

Needless to say, alongside the royal family of Saudi, the royals of Bahrain are close friends of the Saxe-Coburg-Gothas and the PM (prime minister, or pig man if you prefer).

This short video (90 seconds) summarises the relationship between the Brits and the Bahrainis. 

Apparently they are incredibly rich and buy vast amounts of arms from us, but rarely seem to use them for anything except putting down their own people... Plenty spare to be giving to ISIS then?

Incidentally, if you're confused about which side the UK is on, or should be on, or may end up on, then the Rev Stuart's piece here may (or may not) help you to make up your mind. 

It won't make any difference, of course, what you think, or even what Dave thinks, because the UK will be on the side that Mr Obama decides it is on.
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Update: Some more news about the people we do business with.

HAMMOND'S A BIT OF A LIABILITY REALLY, AND THAT'S ONLY ONE OF HIS MANY FAULTS

I've never had much time for the foreign secretary, Philip Hammond.

I first became aware of him when I watched a Despatches programme back in October 2010, which showed that he had transferred a deal of his investments to his wife in order to avoid tax.  And a considerable amount of tax too. Experts said at the time that there could be savings of around £180,000 for every million in profit that was made. Not a bad saving for him. 

But pretty despicable for a Cabinet minister in a government cutting everything to shreds.

Even after that I was barely aware of him and his doings. He has a seemingly well deserved reputation for being dull as ditch water. 

I put him down as another typical selfish rich Tory with little understanding of the world and a huge opinion of his own importance. 

He seems to have spent his life insulting and upsetting people, but typical of his type it never seems to bother him and it doesn't seem to have done his career any harm.

 

Pretty much he's saying "up yours"

Conveniently this article, which appeared the other day, shows a bit more about his abilities, or rather lack thereof. I was particularly shocked (if not a little amused) by the picture above taken at the talks where John Kerry hammered out a deal essentially between America and Iran over their nuclear programme and the rest of the countries just agreed.

You’ll note, incidentally, that he has positioned himself right next to the American Secretary of State (his de facto boss). 

Those of you conversant with the protocols and manners of the Near and Middle East might know that the “thumbs up” signal that Hammond is giving is considered extremely offensive in Iran. Apparently it’s a bit like giving the ‘middle finger’ to someone here….so sort of “Go spin on it!!!” 

Just what you'd expect from the FCO.

Now, as foreign secretary, surely a job for a far more competent man, given its dependence on diplomacy, compromise and good relations, noner of which he seems to be even aware of, much less accomplished in, he has weighed in to the debate over Calais by claiming that millions of migrants pose a threat to the EU’s standard of living and social structure, apparently using the term “marauding migrants” to describe the desperate people at Calais trying to get to England.

 

They need help. They are humans like us.

He said: “So long as there are large numbers of pretty desperate migrants marauding around the area, there always will be a threat to the tunnel security. We've got to resolve this problem ultimately by being able to return those who are not entitled to claim asylum back to their countries of origin.”

Hammond said EU laws meant migrants could be “pretty confident” that after setting foot on EU soil they would not be returned to their country of origin. “Now that is not a sustainable situation because Europe can’t protect itself, preserve its standard of living and social infrastructure if it has to absorb millions of migrants from Africa.”

Of course something has to be done.  Only a fool would think otherwise.

But Mr Hammond considers himself to be an Anglican: the English version of Christianity. Like so many politicians, he claims to be a man of faith.

Maybe as a Christian he would like to consider a Christian approach to the problem instead of referring to these people as if they were a bunch of wild animals. Who does he think he is? Katie Hopkins?

As I said in the comments on a previous post, all these so-called Christians at the head of the UK, including the Queen and the prime minister, might like to ask themselves..."what would Jesus do?", instead of using JC as an election tool.

In many cases these migrant people are fleeing from countries in which the "great" European powers (mainly Britain and France) have dabbled over the years.  Hammond didn't mention that many of them are trying to escape the mess that the Americans, Brits, Italians and Spanish left behind in Iraq and also a Syria overrun by IS, thanks to the chaos of region...or the mess that the French and Brits left after interfering so disastrously in Libya, and leaving behind complete chaos.

Now I know that not everything can be attributed to the interference of the West and in particular Britain, but a fair amount of it can be. Time after time we imagine that the likes of Blair, Brown, Cameron and Osborne know better how to govern Middle Eastern or African countries, when they don't. 

The Queen maintains that every action she takes is guided by Jesus's teachings. So is she opening up her house to people displaced by famine, poverty, war?  Aye right!

And telling the public that these countries have appalling regimes which must be changed just won't work any more when we know that they happily sign massive weapons deals with the Saudis and Bahrainis. 

I don't pretend to have a solution to the migrant problem, but I didn;t choose a career in international politics. However, I'd venture to suggest that Mr Hammond might like to get together with other UN members to see what they can do to stop the traffickers. 

These people who sell freedom and bliss in Europe and in particular the green and pleasant land, where they assure potential customers that everything is as near paradise as you can get. 

It must seem like dream to someone living in fear of their lives in a broken country in North Africa or the Middle East, just as it did for Brits leaving the UK for better countries at various economic downturn/persecution stages of British history. 

But these salesmen lie, just like the ads you see on the telly that tell you that you can take 20 years off your age by using this new cream... and only £60 a jar!

Meeting with other leaders won’t solve the problem, but it might go some way towards stopping it at source. Of course, it won't placate the UKIP faction.

 

Oh just a bit tighter, Mr Bush

We should remember too, that most other European countries, some of them even more broke than we are, have already done a very great deal more that Britain to resettle people fleeing from the horrors of broken regimes that we helped break… Maybe Britain has to take its share of the responsibility for the mess it has left behind it in its leader's search for a Congressional Medal.

 

Some commentators would have you believe they all want to come here.
Not really.

In the meantime Cameron, who has already tried to tone down Hammond’s rhetoric, might like to look to see if the “leader of the house” job could be made available to Hammond.  That’s where failures as FCS usually go, isn’t it?

It’s time we had a proper Foreign Secretary, up to the difficult job that awaits him. 

Oh look, we are being overrun...

I'm thankful that the Minister for External Relations in Scotland, Humza Yousaf, treats the situation with a great deal more decency than his British counterpart. Maybe one day soon he will be the Secretary for Foreign affairs in an independent Scotland.
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PS: Just found out that The Great Foodbank Siege is online and on sale now.

Will write more about it tomorrow.

Here is the link. Please help if you can.

Mark talks more about it here on his blog.

WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE A SENSIBLE ARGUMENT, USE A NONSENSICAL ONE

From YES SCOTLAND

Say goodbye to your pandas

As one Westminster official helpfully pointed out: “No one has fully understood the ramifications for the pandas of any bid for Scottish independence.”

Mobile phone bills will skyrocket

In June last year, the Westminster Government claimed that people in Scotland would be forced to pay mobile phone roaming charges when travelling south of the border – just days after the European Commission announced its intention to abolish the charges from next year.

Scotland would be vulnerable to attacks from space

In comments to the media, Defence Secretary Philip Hammond predicted that Scotland would be financially responsible not only for the decommissioning of Faslane, but also for the cost of establishing a new base in England or Wales, at a cost of ‘tens of billions’. Mind you, on his next visit he also warned that independence would make Scotland vulnerable to attacks from space.

The Trident nuclear base at Faslane would be annexed

Faslane has been a popular topic for the scaremongers. Last year ‘Government sources’ told The Guardian they were examining plans to designate the military base on Gareloch as sovereign UK territory in the event of a Yes vote. The following day Downing Street flatly denied the plan as neither credible nor sensible.

Visiting Auntie Betty in Grimsby? Best pack your passport

Home Secretary Theresa May told the Scottish Conservative Party conference that an independent Scotland would result in a “literal and figurative barrier” with “passport checks to visit friends and relatives”. Really? Even though no such border arrangement exists anywhere else in Europe, and a common travel area is already in operation between the UK and Ireland?

It will be the end of the world as we know it

Labour peer Lord Robertson declared that an independent Scotland would be “cataclysmic” for the West, threaten global stability and be welcomed by “the forces of darkness”. No risk of exaggeration there then…

You'll never see Doctor Who again

Former Westminster Culture Secretary Maria Miller claimed that viewers in independent Scotland would not be able to watch Doctor Who. Never mind that you can currently watch Doctor Who in 75 countries around the world from Angola and Australia to Uruguay and Venezuela.

No you can't, yes you can

In March 2014 the Tories, Labour and Lib Dems joined forces to rule out a currency union. Only weeks later, a senior Westminster government minister, who reports suggest would play a central role in independence negotiations, gave the game away by admitting that a currency union would be agreed to ensure fiscal and economic stability on both sides of the border.

You'll need to drive on the other side of the road

Last September, Labour’s Westminster shadow health secretary Andy Burnham warned that he didn't want to have to drive on the right when he came to an independent Scotland. So ludicrous was this story that the Guardian newspaper decided to run it as an April Fool’s Day story this year. 

Random Thoughts...

Interesting statement from the STUC today:

Botox Dave and his Baby Face

"Responding to the speech, and referendum question and answer session from Johann Lamont MSP at STUC Congress today, Grahame Smith Scottish Trades Union Congress (STUC) General Secretary said:

“Overall Johann Lamont gave a strong and confident performance, showing that she has a close understanding of the priorities of Scottish trade unions. Particularly welcome was her announcement of a Workers’ Charter and pledge to continue to press for improvements in the Procurement Reform Bill to strengthen provisions on Blacklisting and Zero Hours contracts and to deliver a Living Wage.

“However, it was notable that her answers to referendum questions on reserved Westminster policy such as Trident, employment rights public spending cuts and Labour’s support for the Coalition’s Benefit Cap, appeared insufficient to convinced our delegates that the current policies of the UK Labour Party will be sufficient to achieve our social justice ambitions for Scotland should there be a no vote in the referendum.

“Johann’s expressed preference for a separate Scottish currency under independence was interesting. While a separate currency may offer considerable economic freedom longer term it would inevitably mean a period of austerity at least as severe as that currently being pursued by the Coalition.”

It isn't quite the ringing endorsement a Labour leader could have hoped to expect from the Trades Unions, is it? The illustration is mine!

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One of them is the prime minister of this sceptred isle, this England.

The man who sees it as his job to sting the poor, found himself on the receiving end of the equation yesterday. Despite advice that it was dangerous to swim, Cameron decided that he was superior to jellyfish, and found out once again, that he was wrong.

The prime minister is one of those people who is lucky enough to be able to afford a holiday and is currently enjoying his break at a luxury resort on Lanzarote. Unfortunately he returns to England this weekend.

Apparently there were many volunteers keen to apply first aid to the Eton Boy. At first this may seem surprising, given his popularity, however it should be remembered that the best cure for jelly fish sting is fresh urine.

We can't lose now!

More importantly, the jellyfish  was reported to be suffering from shock at having come into contact with something slimy, poisonous and vacuous, but he appears to have suffered no long term damage. 

**********

Although, maybe he's only having a permanent...

Has anyone seen this man? Last seen in Scotland with a fat bloke wearing strange clothing and talking agitatedly about aliens and cataclysms.

If you do see him, best thing is to ignore him. 

Sir George (they're all laughing at me) Robertson (redacted for safety reasons)

He'll soon go away. He's a UK minister, and they never hang around for long in North Britain. As soon as the film is completed, he'll be back to his comfy padded cell at eh MoD.

Coming soon to a picture house near you

IT'S UP TO YOU...

Even the press think it is mad
When on earth are they going to learn?

MoD fire depleted uranium shells into Scottish waters

THE MoD has used a legal loophole to fire thousands of depleted uranium shells into Scottish waters.

Military bosses dodged an international ban by saying the 30 tons of radioactive waste was “placed” rather than “dumped” off the beach in Kirkcudbrightshire. (Interestingly the spell checker doesn't recognise Kirkcudbrightshire and, without a word of a lie, suggests Buckinghamshire!)

Outraged campaigners yesterday called on them to retrieve the toxic waste. (I'd sent that long faced blokey; the one who looks if he smiled his face would crack into a million pieces...Hammond, isn't it?... Yes, well, I'd send him to pick them up with a pair of Marigolds. That would make his miserable face even more miserable.)

Aneaka Kellay, from the Campaign Against Depleted Uranium, said: “The Scottish public will struggle to understand how the MoD thought they could evade their legal and moral responsibility not to pollute the sea by calling this a ‘placement’. (The Scottish public struggle to understand a great amount of what they do in London. Many of them seem to be under a misapprehension that government in London gives some sort of a toss about health and welfare of Scots. As for "morals" and "responsibilities" ...please... you'll make me choke with laughter.)

“However they name their firing programme, the fact remains they have purposefully released nuclear waste into the Solway Firth.”

The toxic rounds end up in the water when tanks at a military range at Dundrennan fire shells at canvas targets on the cliffs.

Minutes of secret MoD meetings released after a Freedom of Information request show an official raised concerns in 2004 that the practice could breach the Convention for the Protection of the Marine Environment of the North-East Atlantic.

He was told the MoD’s interpretation was that “the projectiles were placements not dumping”. The convention states dumping doesn’t include “placement of matter for a purpose other than the mere disposal thereof”. (What a set of seedy, double dealing reprobates. If we were talking about doing this kind of thing anywhere near the Home Counties it would be a very different kettle of fish.) 

Depleted uranium has been linked to increases in cancers and birth defects in Iraq (where once again any kind of morality was chucked out the window in a desperate attempt to impress the President, thereby winning Tony Blair a Congressional Medal which I'm sure Cherry will sell for cash money.)

Minutes show the MoD have fired more than 6700 of the toxic shells into the Solway Firth over the last 30 years. (Ah well, in Iraq they are only foreigners and in the Solway they are only Jocks... who cares?)

SUGGESTIONS ARE THE LEAKY MINISTER WAS HAMMOND...

....THE MINISTER WITH A DISTINCT RESEMBLANCE TO HIS LEAKY SUBMARINES

Q: WHO RULES SCOTLAND? A: THE SOUTH EAST OF ENGLAND

Of the 31 ministers of the UK government none is from Northern Ireland; 1 is from Wales and 2 are from Scotland.  This means that 28 are from England.
No less than 20 (nearly 2/3) are from an area within commuting distance of London.

1. Culture secretary: Maria Miller (Basingstoke)
2. English Education secretary: Michael Gove (Surrey Heath)
3. English Health secretary: Jeremy Hunt (South West Surrey)
4. Cabinet office minister: Francis Maude (Horsham)
5. Minister for cities: Greg Clark (Royal Tunbridge Wells)
6. Energy secretary: Ed Davey (Sutton)
7. Justice secretary: Chris Grayling (Epsom)
8. International development secretary: Justine Greening (Putney)
9. Business secretary: Vince Cable (Teddington)
10. Defence secretary: Philip Hammond (Runnymede)
11. Home secretary: Theresa May (Maidenhead)
12. Attorney general: Dominic Grieve (Beaconsfield)
13. Northern Ireland secretary: Theresa Villiers (Chipping Barnet)
14. Work and pensions secretary: Iain Duncan Smith (Chingford)
15. Communities secretary: Eric Pickles (Brentwood)
16. Minister without portfolio: Grant Shapps (Welwyn Hatfield)
17. Leader of the Commons: Andrew Lansley (South Cambridgeshire)
18. Universities minister: David Willetts (Havant)
19. Chief whip: Sir George Young (NW Hampshire)
20. Prime Minister: David Cameron (Witney)

JUST A FEW OF THE THINGS THAT HAPPENED THIS WEEK...

The GERS figures came out and,
without stopping to consider why they were not so good,
the Naysayers were whooping with delight
to see their own country that little bit poorer.
They obviously hadn't read Derek Bateman on the subject.

Nor had they considered the large part
played in the story by this fool and his deputy. 

Gordon came out with a pile of impracticable propositions for  Devo-max,
which somehow never occurred to him when he had the power to do something about it:
that is before he was an ex-politician and would be Tony Blair world traveller with a strange charity with a propensity to pay out rather a lot for his travel and hotels
and rather a little for good causes!

YES... that's the one Gordo. You're just a little ex-politician

Of course we've been leaking radioactivity all over the place from the
UK's ticket to the top table, and they neglected to tell us about it.
But we also discovered today that some idiot managed to fire a missile,
fortunately a blank, within the secure area itself!
Pip Pip Hammond has told people there are no contingency plans
for Scotland leaving the union,
 because it's simply not going to happen.
Maybe he should stop making speeches and concentrate
his efforts on making sure that his navy stop firing missiles at Scotland
before a live one goes off and blasts Glasgow to Moscow.

What could we do with that money? Half a million a day!

Can't be seen to be too poor to afford new fighters.

No one has agreed to renew them yet , but still they
spend hundreds of millions on them.
Never mind the starving kids; they aren't the Tories' class,
and they are Scottish, so they doubly don't matter...

And then there was the news that Tony Benn died today:

Yes, think of all the help that we could have given people with the money
we wasted on these jets and missiles we are just as likely to fire
 on ourselves only a few meters away from the nuclear subs!

I didn't always agree with him, particularly over Europe and Scotland's independence.
I couldn't work out this international socialist's fear of his mother
 (who was Scottish) being a foreigner,
particularly in light of his wife being American.
But he was, without doubt, a towering figure in left wing politics.
An hereditary peer who fought to divest himself of the incumbrace of a title.
Now there's a novelty for Labour. Today they are falling over each other trying to get their backsides on a red bench. Eh Alistair?
RIP Tony Benn.

We were reminded of what it would be like to have a government
that cared about us... as opposed to the US

Yes, even Mr Carlaw began to see just how silly things were becoming...
and that's quite something.

This was probably what did it.

But, it wasn't all politics...

The puppy arranged for breakfast in bed

Robbie took kick boxing lessons from Ruth

The cat decided that it wanted a word!

And spring sprang!

DON'T WORRY, IT'S ONLY THE JOCKS

THE UK Government has been accused of treating Scotland with contempt after it was revealed a radiation leak at a nuclear testing site at Dounreay was kept secret for two years.

Anger erupted at Holyrood after it emerged UK ministers had waited eight months to inform the environmental watchdog, the Scottish Environment Protection Agency (Sepa), about the incident.

In a rare show of unity, the SNP and Scottish Labour condemned what was described as a cover-up. Labour said the UK Government had treated people with contempt.
The Scottish Government was briefed about the 2012 incident at the Caithness facility yesterday only hours before Defence Secretary Philip Hammond gave a statement to MPs. It tests the same reactors carried by the UK's fleet of nuclear submarines.

SNP defence spokesman Angus Robertson said: "The MoD knew how politically damaging this would be for the UK Government. This smells of a cover-up.
"There are now serious questions to answer. We can only wonder what other nuclear secrets the UK Government is keeping from the people of Scotland."

Glasgow North West Labour MP John Robertson told Mr Hammond: "The stupidity of this Government ... holds no bounds. You are holding the people of this country in contempt."

Mr Hammond insisted the incident posed no risk and was considered a "level 0" on the safety scale, requiring no need to notify authorities.

He said the UK Government informed Sepa, which is responsible for monitoring emissions around Dounreay, about the incident on a confidential basis.

UK Government sources also insisted there was no need to inform Scottish ministers because defence is a matter reserved to Westminster.

The leak emerged yesterday as Mr Hammond announced plans to spend £270 million on the Clyde-based Trident nuclear weapons system as a precaution in the wake of the incident.

Britain's oldest nuclear submarine, HMS Vanguard, will have its reactor refuelled at a cost of £120m. Ministers will then assess the situation to see if all the UK's submarines require work.

The internal leak involved a "miniscule" amount of radiation in a test reactor at Dounreay. The radiation entered the reactor's cooling water, but did not penetrate any further.

Mr Hammond also insisted there was no indication anything had gone wrong on board any of the submarines.

He said the test reactor had been "hammered" and put under intense pressure as part of experiments designed to anticipate what future faults it could develop.

A Ministry of Defence source said the test reactor was "best thought of as around 10 years further down the line than those on the boats".

While only one submarine will be refuelled initially, the entire fleet could need work.

Mr Hammond refused to rule out the possibility the UK could be left without a nuclear deterrent continuously at sea, which would be in breach of the Government's policy

He said: "I'm afraid this is scare­mongering of the worst kind. I have told you, and all the scientific evidence supports the position I have taken, there are no safety issues at stake here."

He added: "'Level 0 events are not routinely made public, they are not routinely reported. That has been the practice of successive governments. That has been the practice across the civil and military nuclear sector."

The test reactor was shut down after the fault was detected. It was restarted in November 2012 and had continued to operate safely since, according to ministers,

It is due to be decommissioned in 2015, but this date could be brought forward if it allowed experts to discover more about the breach.

A Sepa spokesman confirmed it had not told Scottish Government ministers about the leak, despite their oversight role.

He said: "Following an increase of radioactive gases in the Vulcan reactor in 2012, the MoD requested that the issue be kept on a strict need to know basis for security reasons".

I make no comment about this except to say that I wouldn't believe Mr Hammond if he said that London was the capital of England.

ROBERT SEEMS TO BE CLOSING THE GATES ON SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP

I was amused to hear the interview with the ex Secretary for Defense in America, Robert Gates, telling UKOK that he was disappointed with it for its cuts in military spending. Mind you in fairness he said that he was disappointed in the cuts in military spending in the USA too.

He said that UKOK could always be relied upon to be the US’s stooge, erm partner, in whatever it felt it had to do around the world, but recent cuts meant that it was no longer an all-rounder and was therefore letting the US down.

He was particularly concerned that for the first time since the Great War, UKOK didn’t have an aircraft carrier (although I thought that they had some sort of agreement with the French to borrow one of theirs). He felt too that UKOK should keep its weapons of mass destruction.

 

I can see his concern. If you’ve been used to being able to send a set of foreigners to do your dirty work, at their expense and at their government’s unpopularity, and all you had to do was agree that your president would be seen smiling at, or with his arm around, the client state’s first minister, then it must come as a bit of a shock, especially in these hard times, when that service is no longer available to you.

Mr Gates pointed out that the special relationship would be likely to be damaged by these cuts. So touching! A deep friendship entirely reliant upon UKOK punching way above its weight and doing as it is bid.

I don’t know if Mr Gates has taken into consideration the fact that UKOK’s ministry of warfare is having a hell of a job recruiting people.  Massive recruitment programmes are ongoing at the moment, at the same time as the MoD is paying off people 3 days before their pension becomes mature (leaving them in redundancy with a part paid pension plan). So not only is there a shortage of ships, but there is a shortage of personnel too.

The MoD recently had to write off £6.7 million on an online recruitment scheme and has admitted that it is costing the taxpayer £1 million a month to pay for staff to fill in while new software is sourced…

It’s not that long ago since the long-faced millionaire Hammond, said that an independent Scotland would not be able to recruit anyone for its armed forces, because they would be small, pathetic, and only good for Chinese tourists to snap pictures of, standing outside Edinburgh Castle.

Hammond, it seems, is another failure of a minister who comes to Scotland and blows off about something he knows nothing about and then goes back to his own place to make even more of a mess.

Strangely, there was no one from the MoD, least of all Hammond himself, available for comment this morning for the Today programme. However (and you’ll love this) the department did issue a statement saying that UKOK still had the fourth largest  military spend in the world, and after the USA (of course) its troops continue to be the best trained and the best equipped in the entire universe.

Tell that to the lads who had to buy their own kit, share body armour, and use their own mobile phones for communication.