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There are two main reasons, well official reasons anyway, why Mr Cameron has rushed, with what seems like indecent haste, to force a referendum on Scotland in 2013. 


Firstly he says he is doing it because he wants any referendum to be "fair, legal and decisive", because, bless his cotton Vicuña  socks, he thinks they "owe it to the Scottish people" to ensure that. 

That would bring a tear to a glass eye, would it not? 

Fine, and it's sweet of him to be concerned, but did it ever cross his mind  that we have people in Scotland who are trained in law.We have our own law officers, they understand the terms of the Scotland act, and it's more than a little patronising of him to assume that we don't. No one in the Scottish government was going to take liberties with something as important as this. No one has now, or has ever, had any intention of trying to hold a referendum that was unfair, illegal or indecisive. 

We have known since devolution, that any referendum we held would be consultative. The only person who can grant independence is the Queen, on the  advice of her London first minister. Indeed David McLetchie, a Scottish lawyer, and currently the Scottish Conservative's Chief Whip, Business Manager and Constitutional Affairs Spokesman pointed out several years ago that the only question that the Scottish government can put, must ask the voter if (s)he wants the Scottish government to commence negotiations with the UK government... I'm not sure what Mr Cameron was doing to miss that. Maybe it was before he was interested in politics. 

So to use Mr Cameron's own words: calm down dear, nothing to worry about. We weren't planning UDI. 

The second official reason was that the question of whether Scotland, in a few years' time, would be a part of the UK or an independent country, was causing uncertainty for business and for the markets.


We all know, of course, that Cameron doesn't want the referendum  held in the 700th anniversary year of  the Battle of Bannockburn, the year of Scotland holding the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow, and the Ryder Cup at Gleneagles, presumably things which he imagines will stir some pride in the nationalist soul. 


Instead he wants it to be held in the period just after Her Majesty's Diamond Jubilee and the Olympic Games in London, events which doubtless he imagines will stir the spirit of the British Bulldog and good Old Blighty war time spirit, of Keep Clam and Carry On. He may even be planning get Vera Lynn out of retirement to give us her White Cliffs of Dover just to reinforce the image.

But to get back to the pretence.  If Mr Cameron thinks that business or the markets are so worried about uncertainty caused by whether on not a certain union will be in place in a few years' time, would it not be sensible for them also to be sure of the UK's position relative to the European Union. Maybe he could do this by holding a referendum on the same day? We might even trust him to do it fairly, legally and decisively (despite the fact that he really didn't stick to his word over the last one).

Oh, and while he is doing that, he might like to find out how the Deputy Prime Minister feels about his vetoing treaties. The uncertainty caused by the Prime Minister reading not just from different hymn sheets, but reading them in different languages must be far more damaging to the interests of business and the markets than little old Scotlandshire's issues.