Wednesday, 4 January 2012


Well, did you ever?

Following Mrs Clinton's visit to Burma, or more properly according to the UN, Republic of the Union of Myanmar, guess who's trailing out there on a jaunt to tell them all about how we will support them in democracy?

Yep, Wee Willie, from the ex-colonial power; the one which gave them such good examples of democracy, equality and respect for human rights when they were in charge of things.

The Burmese much resented their treatment at the hands of the British and  there were violent riots from early on up to the 1930s. Some of the discontent was caused by a disrespect for local culture and traditions, such as the British refusal to remove shoes when they entered pagodas. 

George Orwell wrote of his disgust at his role in the empire machine and at the way that the British treated the Burmese, when he was stationed there as a policeman in the Indian Police Service.

Buddhist monks became the vanguards of the independence movement as they have been against the military rule that has been in place since 1962. 

So Willie will flyt out there like the great while hope, and lecture them about human rights and about democracy. Maybe he will advise them be like us and get a non elected head of state. In the old days he might even  have offered a minor Brit royal for the job. Prince Edward or some other nonentity.

He cannot in conscience call for free and fair elections, given how unfair elections are in the UK, and he will have to ensure that the Burmese do not try to copy in any way, our parliamentary systems.

He will be expected to lecture them on prisoner release, human rights, and to ask what Britain can do to help.

Why should Britain do anything? What does it have to offer?

Is Mr Hague well versed in the running of  countries on the other side of the world? Does he have experience of tropical rain forest agriculture, or housing, road building, education, health or job creation to offer? Probably not.

Does he then have money to offer so that expertise can be paid for? Nope. Not a bean.

So why exactly is he going? 

No idea? Nah, me neither.

Still it's probably nice and warm out there this time of the year, and he'll get to play at being important.


  1. Ministers, or heads of state only go on such jaunts when there is a chance of business deals. [I wouldn't be surprised if they were out there to sell them arms. The UK is the fourth largest arms dealer in the world.] The human rights issue is a good PR mission [if they manage it then even better PR]. I'm not being sarcastic, that's just the way things are. Check what deals were and weren't done later on when it's released.

  2. tris

    So why exactly is he going?

    Err! Ladyboys perhaps ..........well you chose that pic of himself with the 'Boy'(Good looking one if i do say so meself) he had adjoining rooms with

  3. Imagine selling arms to Burma Gedguy. Mind you I remember that when the trouble started in North Africa, Cameron was out there in the gulf selling arms to Bahrain. Strangely we seemed to be on the side of the rebels in Tunisia, Egypt,and even more so oil rich Libya... but we seemed to be on the side of the King in Bahrain, although his people were asking for the same things as the North Africans.

  4. Jeez Niko. How much more worldly wise you are than I.

    That never occurred to me.

    I thought his mate there was a tad on the ugly side myself. Maybe a lady boy would be prettier!!

  5. Understood CH. Say no more.

  6. Remember when “call me” tried to tell the Chinese about human rights when they were out there selling arms. The Chinese just told them to piss off and mind their own business! And my didn’t they look stupid?

    You think they would learn, but no.

  7. What does Willie look like in that picture with his boy... erherm.. I mean you male assistant who shares a bed to save money! Has he heard the phrase "mutton dressed as lamb"?

  8. Remember Munguin, when Blair told Mugabe off for his shocking human rights abuses, and one of Mugabe's 'go fors' (Mugabe being a president, didn't respond to mere prime ministers) told Blair to put his own house in order before he started lecturing other people, and he mentioned trains not running on time and dirty hospitals , if I remember rightly.

    I just wish the UK would mind its own business. I mean it's all window dressing. What are we going to do when they say NO? Send a gunboat? Oh we don't have any, and Cameron has fallen out with the French with whom we are supposed to be sharing, so that's that.

    Much though I loathe Mugabe and his ilk, I can't help feeling that he was right on that: fixing potholes, cleaning hospitals, alcohol, drugs, unemployment, the misery of old age in a cold climate, are all things that might just occupy the minds of these people before they worry about what's going on in a country on the other side of the globe.

    Yeah Wee Willie looks a right pratt there with his Spad (Special Advisor on Foreign Affairs, the chauffeur).

  9. You've got it all wrong.

    Hague is a salesman for McWestminster. He's off out with his PA to sell them a franchise of the popular parliamentary democracy of choice.

    Basically, for a fee (of course) they let them use all the McWestminster branding, fill it with indigenous staff and every now and again an area manager (from the FCO) will pop out for a meeting to make sure things are ticking over and sell them the tools to make sure things stay that way.

    Why McWestminster I hear you ask? Well, the perks for staff are without equal, expenses are great and once in, its almost impossible to be dislodged. Products on sale are easy to understand (the actual ingredients can be found in very small print on stickers under the seats.

    Most importantly, customers - the people supposed to be getting served won't get that funny after taste in their mouths or strange feelings of being conned until its to late to do anything; no refunds!

    McWestminster: I'm loving it. (And so will you when you get a job here.)

    Bill (the name he prefers when selling, its more pally) is taking a leaf out of Tesco and McDonald's book and rebuilding the British empire one franchise at a time. He takes his honey along as a bit of androgenous eye candy.

    Sales are slow though for Team Bill, they're lagging way behind in the governmental franchise market, they'll need to do some major catch up if they're to beat Chicken Cottage in 2012/13.

  10. Ha ha Pa Broon...

    Now we have got it sussed... I'm just a wee bit concerned that you are calling his squeeze eye candy though...should you not have gone to SpecSavers?

    Any chance of a job for me out there? I could do with some sunshine and tropical fruit salad!

  11. Why that picture of Hague?

    You implying something? I dislike rude implications, just be man enough to say it.

    There is precious little about two heterosexual male friends sharing a room, regardless of position. Just like there is should be no assumption that just 'cos two gay men shared a room, on work business, there was sex going on.

    I honestly dislike OK mag style tittle-tattle.

    Sorry Tris/Munguin, if I misread the deployment of that photo, but you understand to what I object?

  12. TBH Dean, I Google Hague and saw that pic on the front page. It was the one that showed him as a human being instead of the pompous pretendy First Secretary

    There's no need to be coy, it seems patently obvious to me what was going on between them, and I say that's between them and Ffion.

    Nothing to do with us, or I suppose it wasn't till he tried to spin lies about it.

  13. It isn't the business of anyone. The fact you assume it is somehow 'gay' says more about you than him.

  14. I didn't "assume" Dean. Everyone, apparently, has known for a very long time that Mr Hague is bi-sexual. It has been reported a number of times in the press and the only thing of interest to most people in the story about him and his Special Advisor, was that the man was appointed without any seeming knowledge to back him up in a reasonably paid job where he was supposed to advise the Foreign Secretary about Foreign Affairs.

    He was also Mr Hague's third SPAD, when ministers are only allowed to have two, and appointed without the approval of the Prime Minister.

    However that is not why the picture was chosen, nor was it what the story was about.

    Do you have any comments on the UK government poking its nose into the affairs of Myanmar?

  15. They do make a nice couple though...


  16. Jeez...Pa Broon. I dunnae fancy yours! But then, I'm no that keen on mines either... :)