WHICH ONE DO YOU THINK IS THE BIGGER MUPPET?

Oh really! Don’t politicians make you laugh out loud?

So, who is responsible for all my mirth so late on a Sunday night? Not for the first time, it’s the hapless Phil Woolas muppet. (Remember him from his encounter with, and thorough beating by, the lovely Joanna Lumley?)

So Woolybrain has been complaining that the education of his own children has been adversely affected by immigrant children who don’t speak English properly. Now that would be weird, given that he’s a junior minister in the Labour government, but it becomes farcical when you remember that he’s actually the minister responsible for......... wait for it......

.........Immigration.

The wool-brained minister admitted that the influx of immigrants had put local authorities in England under strain. Children are being taught in multi-ethnic classes with a large number of different language speakers in each class, at all different levels of ability in the understanding, reading, writing and speaking of English. As a guy who for a short time taught languages, in both Scotland and France, I can appreciate just how incredibly difficult this must be for teachers.

Interestingly this is a far larger problem in England than it is in Scotland, where the immigration requirements are entirely different. (This is a very good reason for having a separate authority to deal with this problem in each country as Scottish needs are totally ignored in the interest of England’s greater good.)

Chris Grayling, the shadow home affairs spokesman said it was ridiculous that the minister could defend policies which had brought about this situation. Of course it is fair to say that Grayling is no stranger to controversy himself with inordinately dubious expenses claims; offensive comments about a part of Manchester; and a corker of a faux pas regarding Richard Dannett when he was critical of the general's suggested appointment as an advisor to Gordon Brown, only to find out that he had, in fact, been touted as an advisor to David Cameron, which he then thought was a splendid idea. A rather wooly-headed guy too then.

It’s quite worrying when you look at the calibre of politicians holding some sort of office in the Westminster parliament, but surely Woolhead after his encounter with Princess Joanna, and his idiotic support for bonuses for executives of the Borders Agency, which must surely be one of the least efficient organisations in the world, must be pretty near the top of the list for politicians your granny knitted, but there's not a lot to chose between them......

Pictures: Phil Woolass and Security scanner. Phil’s the one with the suit on. And Chris Grayling pretending he’s an ordinary person using some public transport. Chris is the one on the hard left (joke!)

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