After all, I pondered, who'd want to break away from a society that, instead of tackling the tiny amount of fraud that there is in the social security system, takes a sledge hammer and cracks everyone who is not strong enough to fight for themselves. It's cheaper, saves more money, and the only people it hurts are poor and uninfluential, so what's not to like?
Who wouldn't be happy to be a part of a state that, as the result of the policy of unfettering rents, (most recently by Labour), from which people have made a fortune, the housing benefit bill has soared to an unsustainable level, and thinks that the best way to deal with this is not to cap rents at a reasonable level, and not to build affordable rental houses of the size that people need, but to reduce the amount of money available for benefit?
In theory, people should simply have to downgrade... but in fact they are not able to do this because of there's no available housing, and as a result of the most recent policies, even the most awful of houses in the most terrible of areas can command the same rent as the nicest property of the same size in a pleasant suburb.
Who'd not be delighted to live in a society where there is no money to expand the economy regardless of how many times the government is told that it must try to kick start some activity, because all the money that has been created by QE over the past few years by both the red and blue/yellow parties has gone straight into the banks... The same banks whose greed played an enormous part in getting us into our current situation... and the same banks that the government refuses point blank to penalise, and goes so far as to fight against the rest of the EU to try to ensure that no one can interfere with their bonuses?
Who'd not be charmed to live in a country where the government wants to play at world statesmanship, take on foreign wars; cut the troops on the ground and the facilities available to them, but insists that it must have a nuclear capability because without it the seat at the top table would no longer be theirs...? Think of the loss of prestige (and put out of your heads the suffering of the troops left to fight more and more with less and less).
Why, surely you'd have to be mad to want to break away from all that.
Who'd not want to see wage and benefit increases at 1% and gas and electricity prices rising at 10-20% with forecasts of worse to come? Surely that's a joy.
Even devolution, it seems to me, has been a step too far. If we had just stayed as a county in the north of England, we too could have enjoyed Serco stealing from our National Health Service just as they are in England and have the head of that service admit his part in the cover up of the most horrific neglect and death of patients in order to reach targets, and yet stay in his job.
No. Surely Alistair and his friends David and Nick, Ed and Johann and Ruth and that funny wee bloke are right.
This is the life.
Update: I'm indebted to Marcia for bringing this Scottish Sun editorial to my attention.