"It is understood that the Government is monitoring the global markets closely and the Chancellor is receiving regular updates."
Doesn't that just put your mind at ease? No? Nor mine!
I'm not sure I have much of a handle on the crisis, or crises, that are befalling us now. But what I have seen is rich bankers and stock brokers hiding their heads in their hands. They only ever do that when THEY are losing money. So that's something to be cheerful about.
Of course, they will find a way to get it back. Probably by making us pay.
So I know it's bad, and I realise that I shouldn't smirk, but I just got such joy from seeing these smug gits (who STILL think that they are the cleverest people alive, after the mess they made of the world's finances a couple of years ago) look completely miserable.
The good thing to remember in all of this is that the money is still there. It may have been wiped off a stock market or two, but it didn't evaporate...so, in as much as it was ever there, it's still there. And it will return to the stock markets and rescue the pension funds, so badly hit today.
So, go to bed with the comforting thought that George Gideon Bloody Osborne has his hand firmly in the till... no, I'm sorry, that was a typo. I meant ON the TILLER.