Friday 16 September 2016

TODAY'S THE DAY

SOON ALL THE WAITING WILL BE OVER


Yes, dear readers, today we shall find out who will "lead" UKIP into the future.

Some say that many people have spoiled their papers and written "Come back Nigel, we love you". Well, when I say some, I think it was Nigel  actually, but no matter.

The UKIP conference takes place today in Bournemouth, England, and this afternoon will see its next leader announced and Nige will retire gracefully to the back seat. It promises to be exciting for them because normally their next leader has been their last leader.

Mr F has refused to back any of the contestants for the Great British Half Baked Off this year, but he did indicate that Channel Four might cover it next time round. He did admit that he had been dominant in the party. Looking around at others, like Lord Pearson of Rannoch, or David Coburn, I can't imagine why.

Farage is still the centre of attraction, however, for today at least, and was leading a tribute to the factoid that 100 years ago the first tanks were used in the Great War. (I can't help felling that politicians have played the First World War to death for publicity.) He didn't miss an opportunity to tell anyone who was listening that Britain had centuries of experience of dealing with European tyranny.  How fortunate, I thought, it is that there was never any tyranny here on these islands. Or indeed, is!


In any case, I digress. It seems to me looking at this list of policies, that maybe they could save a bit of money and just appoint Theresa May as their new leader. 

After all, it's pretty much a part time job, and all the time that Farage spend drinking smoking and carousing, Mrs May could spend running the Tories. All she would have to remember would be that when she had a purple leopard skin shoes on she was in favour of people being able to park for free in hospitals, and when she had her blue hat on, she expected them to be dropped at the hospital door by the chauffeur.

I hope it is her, because I've never heard of any of the other contestants and i can't be bothered learning a new name.

27 comments:



  1. what I (and other fair minded people ) find amusing is the
    loud mouth unelectable as an MP having aided in getting an advisory
    vote to leave the EU .Now the really real leadership is needed he
    cowardly runs away to stand on the side lines and whinge .
    but I am not surprised .

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    1. Well, I guess that when it all goes wrong, he will be able to say that if only HE had been negotiating with the dreaded foreigners, HE would have done it right, whereas of course the disaster that will follow will now be Tessy's fault.

      I mean I can see why Cameron resigned. He failed to get what he advocated and like Salmond, the only honourable thing to do was to stand down. Although he said he wouldn't (but I think Alex said that too).

      But Farage won. He got what he wanted, and seemed to feel that the job stopped there.

      What an idiot.

      Still he's making enemies all over Europe and now the USA too.

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    2. @ Niko: This comment really caught my eye. I'm accustomed to the British habit of putting a "u" in every conceivable word, but I had no idea that you folks have gotten into the habit of putting a "g" in "whine." There are American dictionaries and spell checkers which will show you proper word spellings that use the letters of the American alphabet with much greater economy and efficiency.....such as in "donut" for example, which you often spell with a "g" as well as a second "u." More to the topic at hand, I'm glad to see that Nigel made his way back to you after a campaign appearance with our Mr. Trump in Mississippi. I was afraid he might still be in the deep South somewhere.

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    3. Whinge as pronounced like hinge.
      Meaning to constantly complain and moan.
      A bit like Niko.

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    4. whine and whinge have a different pronunciation once
      we are divided by a common language

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    5. Interesting! I had no idea the pronunciation is different.

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    6. Juteman meaning annoying little fart lol

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    7. I think,Danny, we would have been very happy for Mr Farage to stay and be superior over with you. As it is he is embarrassing us in Brussels.

      Bang on Jutie. I was going to say "binge", but that's just me!

      Yes, Niko, I imagine that's exactly what he means. :)

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    8. We thought it advisable to send back Mr. Farage post haste.

      So you would say to someone..."oh stop your whinging" with whinging rhyming with binging? Gee, for an American that would take some real getting used to.

      Of course there is that way you have of pronouncing the word schedule as shhhedule instead of skedule. That also sounds very odd on this side of the pond.

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    9. I was in a bar in Manhattan, and tried to order a round of drinks. Four beers and an Amaretto and Coke. The beers were soon delivered, but the barman asked for the last drink again. An Amarreto and Coke, I said again. And again. Sorry man, my fault but I can't understand your accent.
      This was supposed to be an Irish bar, with an 'Irish' barman.
      I tried to picture how De Niro would order it, and the barman got it. Ah, an Amarreto and Coke!
      Too many 'rs'. :-)

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    10. We're an odd lot Danny.

      But you could have done us all a favour and maybe sent Mr Farage somewhere else. Anywhere would have done. Possibly the moon... you have all those rocket thingies in America... Maybe North Korea. Mr Kim could have put him on one of his devices.

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    11. They're an odd lot Jutie.

      (See what a diplomat I am)

      I mean for goodness' sake... Color and not colour... Jeeeez!

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    12. Danny... Since when did sch sound sk?

      I ask you...

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    13. @ Juteman......Yes, the The "rs" in Amarreto were probably the problem. To Americans, it seems that the Brits and Europeans do not want to actually pronounce the "r" sound at all. They all seem to want to soften it (or totally swallow it) in one way or another. On the other hand, Americans have a super hard "r" sound that will raise the hair on the back of your neck. Imagine a cartoon lion going Grrrrrrrrrrrr!

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    14. Tris......you have an excellent point about that "sch" sound in schedule. On the other hand, I doubt that you pronounce school as shhhhhool. (But I could be wrong about that.)

      As for Nigel, if we had realized that you didn't really want him back, I imagine that we could have arranged something. Shipping him to North Korea as you suggest....or even Russia.....might well have been possible considering Mr. Trump's well known mutual admiration and close personal relationships with Kim Jong-un and Vladimir Pitin. ;-))

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    15. Hmmm... yes, as for the school schhhhhoooool thing... you'll find it depends how drunk we are...

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  2. Farage is about to embark on a tour of Europe (sound familiar) to convince leaders that it is not England that us out of step with Europe but rather the other way round.
    Will he be run out of town in the back of a police van as happened when he last visited our capital city or will they cheer him off on his train?
    Pretty sure it will mostly be the former.
    He has become a bit like the leader of Scotland's main opposition party,deluded into thinking they are omnipotent.

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    1. I suspect he will make it harder for the Brits to negotiate anything decent, as he is pretty much a hate figure with all except the extreme right.

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  3. Diane James (MEP UKIP) becomes UKIP leader.

    Hmm and how will that go down with the EU negotiators?

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    1. Never heard of her BJS.

      But i wouldn't have heard of the others either, I suspect.

      How many did Nigel get?

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    2. F...UKIP

      Nothing more to add.

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    3. On a serious note, I don't know why they don't march around wearing brown or black shirts; scarey idiots, idiots they may be, but still Scarry.

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  4. We need answers from the English National Party,aka Tory/UKIP party about the benefits to Scotland of no longer being in the European Union.

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    1. Well, they don't have any, but they don't have any for England either.

      Iain McW's article on Brexit is interesting.

      It's in teh side bar or here:

      https://iainmacwhirter.wordpress.com/2016/09/17/mps-and-msps-must-say-no-to-no-say-on-brexit/

      It's well thought out.

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