THEY RESPECTED WHITE VAN MAN; NOW THEY RESPECT PINK VAN LADY

How completely out of touch with people is Labour?

Harriet turns up at ASDA: That's the place to find women! 

You really have to wonder what on Earth Harriet Harman was thinking about when she dreamt up the idea of touring England in a pink van to talk to women.

You might have thought that Labour would have learned some sort of lesson from the scorn that was poured on them and their Tory mates in Scotland when the 'patronising woman' ad for the NO campaign was released. 

You'll doubtless remember that that particular campaign featured a woman drinking a mug of coffee in her kitchen, and telling us all that she didn't really understanding the finer points of the politics. Instead she spoke about "that man aff the telly"; she didn't know who he was or what he was... (the First Minister) and worried about her kids and getting her husband's breakfast.

You may also recall that it went down like a lead balloon, and was mercilessly satirised on social media.

The idea that women only take an interest in politics when they are engaged by another woman, preferably in the  kitchen or supermarket, or involved in a domestic task, talking about children, or bedecked in pink, is surely something belonging to the 1950s. I don't know a single woman who has been impressed by this and I do know a few who have been pretty much angered by it. 

Rumour has it that Jim Murphy (the sexy beast)
 is out there talking to the ladies!

That all this was the brainchild of arch-feminist Harriet Harman is almost beyond belief. And like the patronising woman and her "eat your cereal" broadcast, it has rightly been pulled apart on social media and on television.

Clearly the Tories think it is a good idea!

THEIR BEGGING LETTERS TO ME ARE A CONSTANT SOURCE OF AMUSEMENT

As you may remember, I replied to an email from the Tories using a false name (Peregrin Fotherington Smythe). It has proved to be most entertaining!

There is a debate going on in British politics which I never thought I'd see, Peregrin.

Because whatever else I disagreed with Tony Blair and Gordon Brown about, we always agreed that businesses are the backbone of Britain's economy, creating jobs and giving people the security of a pay packet.

But now Ed Miliband's Labour Party have decided that business is the enemy.

They want to hit Britain's businesses by raising their taxes and fixing prices. They've opposed our measures to cut red tape and help businesses grow and create more jobs.

Even worse, Ed Miliband's plans for more borrowing and more debt would lead to higher interest rates and instability for businesses.

Everyone who works in a business or runs a business has reason to fear a Labour Government.

Peregrin - we have to stop Labour getting into power and costing jobs. Please donate £20 to our campaign today and let's make sure Britain stays on the road to recovery.

While Labour attack businesses, the Conservatives back them.

We've cut their taxes, cut red tape, and invested in the roads, rail and infrastructure they need.

More than that though, we've taken the difficult, long-term decisions necessary to give businesses stability and build an economy that is once again attracting investment from around the world.

Because it's no accident that last year Britain was the fastest growing of any major economy. It's no accident that there are more people in work than ever before in our country.

So we'll continue to back Britain's businesses and build a country full of opportunities for young people and security for families.

But Peregrin - I need your help on this. Please donate £20 today and let's secure a better future for Britain.

Yours sincerely,

David Cameron

Facebook.com/DavidCameronOfficial

£20? On yer bike Cammy! You want £20, you go ask some of your dodgy millionaire friends, like the HSBC bloke you made a Lord then a government minister!

LEFT SCOTLAND...I THINK YOU'LL LIKE WHAT THIS GUY IS SAYING

SO, YOUR ROYAL HIGHNESS, WHICH PARTY WOULD YOU VOTE FOR?

It seems that Charlie Rothsay Saxe Coburgh-Gotha is a Tory,
given that this is a Conservative Party fund raiser auction we are looking at and he has made a contribution, albeit not financial.
We know that ex-prime ministers for the Tory Party were invited to his son's wedding
and that Labour ex-prime ministers were not, and that gave us a hint as to his politics
But this is active party political involvement.
Is this a suitable man to be head of state?

Just for a laugh, here we have the Iron Lady and the Iron Man (?$%&*)appearing here side by side for the benefit of the party. Frankly, I'd pay good money to avoid both.

HSBC Tax Dodgers

Cameron could have a future writing satire.He doesn't have one as a politician!

Sometimes you wonder what satirists do for a living in these days of politicians, and the rest of the Establishment, satirising themselves.

I mean in the past you'd have expected a George Parr interview on the Rory Bremner Show, or some smart comment from a panellist on 'Have I Got News for You?', or 'The News Quiz'.

But how can you improve on the jokes these people make of themselves?

Labour's loan

Of course just as the Labour Party were chortling at the unfortunate revelation that the Swiss subsidiary of HSBC had been helping its customers to fiddle, and that the man who had been in charge of all this fiddling had been ennobled by Cameron and made a government minister... (you couldn't make this up), news broke suggesting that the Labour Party took out a loan of £2 million with a certain billionaire (we shall call him Richard Caring because that's his name), who banked with the company. (He was known to have withdrawn just over that sum in cash from the Geneva branch of HSBC only a matter of months before in 2006.) 

The Scottish Office leader and some random ned.

Incidentally the loan was to be free of interest until July 2010, after which it would accrue interest at a rate of 6.5%. So, as it apparently is not yet paid back, it looks like Labour may have a large interest bill to settle by September of this year when the whole sum is to be be returned. And I expect he'll want him money because Mr Caring has somewhat disingenuously transferred his affections to the Tory Party. I wonder where that will leave Blair who has been travelling the world, making millions, thanks to Mr Caring generosity, in his private plane.

You can add to that the titbit that a FoI request submitted by Alasdair Allan* has revealed that Jim Murphy claimed for 2 tins of Irn Bru on his parliamentary expenses. Clearly he could not be expected to be able to do his parliamentary duties without a quick gurgle of the drink that's made from Girders (or Gorders as I originally typed... Freudian error?).

And finally... for a belly aching laugh, the above mentioned Gadfly, Blair, has said that he will do whatever it takes to help Ed Miliband into 10 Downing Street. No really, he has.

Good place for  warmongering
 ex prime ministers who need to lie low.

Seriously Tony, if you want to help Ed, I'd suggest a few months' holiday in Antarctica...or maybe you could ask Richard Branson if he has any flights to the moon going any time soon...

* Thanks to Anon, below, for correcting my error that it was Guido that initiated the FoI request.

A FEW FOTOS FOR FRIDAY

Well, if Paul says it...

Jackie, it seems, doesn't count too well...

You'd have thought that if they
were going to tackle poverty,
they would have achieved something by now?

It's engine oil!

Maybe they don't read too well either?

We get what England decides to vote for.
It's only right...out of 650 MPs
we return only 59.

If you are better together
then stay together. We shan't miss you.

TUESDAY ON TWITTER...

Still, his haircut couldn't have cost much, surely?
I mean it's a two minute job!

He must really like us.

No wonder their legislation is so terrible.
They are permanently pissed.

But the BBC LOVE him.

Don't hold your breath.
It has something in common with Chilcot.
Important people are being judged.

80... and still working?
Not as Firemen we hope?

Seriously this is a reminder to people to check up
 whether or not they are registered to vote
and to check who else may be registered at their address.
Put NOTHING past them.

Why don't we all learn from Iceland?

Not in a country where the ruler's family live in 5 palaces
and where the government has the money to spend on WMDs

Would I lie to you?

No surprise there.

And that's from one of their own.

If only his stupid posh head was on fire....

Principled lot, these Labour MPs.

The Scotsman?
Jim Murphy's fan club letter?
Actually it's a tad insulting to salesmen of snake oil.

But obviously only for you plebs.

Nice work there Iain, you odious creep.
You sure are helping disabled people to take pride in
themselves and work hard for their living.

Fan club secretaries Jackie Burd and Sarah Smith.

Very unpleasant cheeks too.

Sometimes I have the impression that Murphy missed his vocation.
Clearly he was not destined for academe because for all the years he tried
he never graduated. Clearly he wasn't supposed to be in London Labour because
his leader demoted him. And clearly being leader of the Scottish branch office
isn't going too well (given the polls).  Perchance he was destined to be a footballer!

LET'S SHAKE UP THE BRITISH ESTABLISHMENT

https://www.gov.uk/register-to-vote here if you have not already done so.

IT TAKES A SPECIAL KIND OF LOWLIFE TO DO THIS

Post by Greater Maryhill Foodbank.

SNAPS ON SUNDAY

Notice on door.

Because we are all one great nation ...

The Alexander BOTHERS

Lazy bitch. Get down the food bank and help out
if you don't have a job.

So... they might as well not bother publishing Chilcot.

What kind of inhuman society is responsible for this?

Ah, yes, the plague that is IDS.
Just think, starving this kid will probably save £5,000.
As ye sew, so shall ye reap, you bastards.

That's why all four nations must agree to withdraw
before any action is taken.

Just as well that I'm not in charge.
They'd freeze before I gave them a cent.

Easy. She doesn't matter, and being big shots does.

But you don't get Congressional Medals for feeding
hungry kids, do you Mr Blair?

Bunch of profiteering scum.