PROBLEMS WITH HARD BOARDERS

A Twitter friend, Craig, (@Jahaangle) pointed out the dangers of scrolling down to the readers' comments on the Daily Express.

Sooooo, what have we?

Old Majicarpet was happy that Scotland voted to stay in the Union, but seems somewhat displeased that we are not equally content with :

i) Losing the tax office jobs we were promised would be secured by voting NO;

ii) Losing the passport office jobs we were told would be secured by voting NO;

iii) Finding out that the warning we got that pensions were unsustainable in Scotland, was actually true of the UK;

iv) Finding that the 13 Frigates promised in the weeks before the referendum weren't actually going to be built in Scotland at all because there was no money (given that £200 billion had to be found for Trident, and god knows how many billion for the English railways, and heaven only knows how much to keep the "honourable" members and the "noble" lords in the kind of luxury to which they are accustomed);

v) That the only way that we could stay in the EU (which 63% of us want) was in fact NOT to stay in the UK. Because of votes in England and Wales, we are going to be leaving. Well, maybe when the people who orchestrated it have worked out what the hell we are going to do instead.

Odd that we'd not be satisfied with that and so many other things. Still we're a funny lot, aren't we? Foreign, you see! And foreigners and Daily Express readers don't exactly get on.

In any case, if we do have another referendum, we can see what kind of conditions will be opposed upon us, should we choose to allow the Daily Express readership any input on the terms and conditions.

First of all our "Boarders" and going to have to be hard. So get ready to repel boarders, because we have enough hard cases here already. Then, and somehow it's all in the same sentence, all Scots (with a lower case "s") need to have a passport. But then most of us probably do, already, whether we are scots or Scots. An EU one for the moment. 

I'm just wondering if the 'hard boarders' will have to have passports. Whatcha think?

I'm assuming any Scot who doesn't have one wouldn't be able to go to the rUK, should they want to? But, wouldn't, equally, any rUK person also need a passport... or would they not ever want to come to Scotland, cos it's so crap?

Apparently too, we have "to" much of the country so these "boarders" have to be "reset" (isn't that taking stolen goods to sell?). It's these 'hard boarders' again, I tell ye, pinching stuff and flogging it!

Twenty per cent tariff on whisky, water, electricity, gas, not to mention haggis and shortbread..? Yep, I'll go with that. Can you afford it rUK?

The shipyard thing is sort of a done deal anyway. They stopped ordering ships when they got their desired results in 2014, and have spend the intervening time cancelling the orders they made to win shipbuilding votes.

I'm sure that we could allow the vote on Scottish independence to be UK wide, if the vote on UK independence were EU wide, don't you think?

I'm unconvinced about the oil all belonging to England though; I'm not sure that Wales or Northern Ireland would see it that way either.... but, that said, it is a huge liability, apparently, so maybe, yes. 

In return they could take their nuclear subs on day one, and to make it a decent deal they can take the Windsors and their aristocracy too, including the Moany woman, I mean lady. They could put them all together on Trident and sail them away.

THE NEW FACE OF THE DWP...

Misspellings and all... Spoof Poster

IT'S WEDNESDAY

Tris is sick in bed, so we're afraid today's post is a collection of photographs he picked out earlier. 

Trickle up?

Well, it certainly works for some... 
and it comes with the added advantage of being able
 to call the workers scroungers... 

Yes... that's what I mean. Bet none of this lot has been down the food bank, except to open it and get a free lunch and a photo op (eh Fluffy?)

I've heard that sometimes these suits don't work
and people get horribly stung.

You are certainly making progress in that direction
But, you see, you have to get the word out that this is a broken dump
where people eat out of bins, if their town doesn't have a foodbank.
They still think the streets are paved with gold.

A visionary who was inspired at school by Charles Dickens.

Well, the answer to that is obvious.
Some people think that its wrong that it is hard to be very rich.
Obviously.

And Kez wants to move them to Glasgow?
This, of course, is just to spite the Noble Marchioness Moan, who's just
bought herself a new  balcony in London and on return to Scotland
would be plagued by insulting stuff on the internet (which of course, she can't see in England!)

Yep, that's her. And she's in the legislature.
I hope SHE doesn't "steel" anything.
It's mainly gold in there.
But clearly we can expect her to stand up for  the
Human Rights Act.

Ah, it's all in the interpretation of the figures.

I'd say, yes, I've been trying to tell people that for years.

There's no doubt about it, the Euro was a failure.
You can't have a single currency in widely differing economies.
But, you have to ask if printing money is really the answer to financial crises.

OK Jeremy, I'll try really hard not to call any of your colleagues
scroungers, shirkers or skivers.
It's hard though, because all the other adjectives I can think of for them
are a bit rude for a blog read by children.