DON'T DO THAT, GEORGE

It always seemed to me that the current Conservative government largely comprised a bunch of over-privileged, upper middle class to lower upper class men from what the English somewhat weirdly call “public” school (as most of the public never get near them) and Oxbridge. After the relative egalitarianism of the previous 18-year spell of  Tory misrule, it was a return to the days of the old school tie.

In practical terms that meant that what you got was a bunch of incompetent Hooray Henrys, in post because of who they knew, rather than what they knew, and with absolutely no idea of what species populated the world outside of their own class (except for Nanny and Cook, the Butler and possibly the Head Gardener).

Scary, of course. But if these people had any saving grace it was that they were largely “gentlemen”. You know what I mean: “a chap’s word is A CHAP'S bond” dontcha know?

Well, that seems to have gone out the window.

A matter of days after the now infamous love bombing from the Olympic Park, which went disastrously wrong,  Gideon George Oliver Osborne (if they’d just transposed his two middle names, we could have called him Gogo), broke the terms of the Edinburgh agreement, which states [in more legal language] that the two governments agree to work together to co-operate with the free will of the Scottish population. He came to Scotland to tell us we couldn't hang on to the pound in an independent Scotland. I can't help but feel that it was a pretty silly thing to say.

It smacks of desperation.  It is pretty obviously designed to put the frighteners on Scots. It wouldn't be for the good of the UK economy or the Scottish economy, because, although our currency would be strong, we'd still have to do business with a UK whose currency wasn't worth the paper it was printed on. It appears to be a nasty move on Osborne's part, designed to scare, perhaps better described as bully boy (as opposed to Bullingdon Boy) tactics, which I suppose is what you get in “public school” playgrounds and “dorms” when a responsible member of staff isn't around to control the children.

Everyone knows that the pound is an internationally traded currency, and as such anyone can use it anywhere, with or without the agreement of the Bank of England, so technically they can't even say we can't use it. We can. We just can't use it with their blessing.

But it doesn't seem to be a threat that was ever designed to be carried out. It would damage the English and RUK economies. Almost certainly the pound would tumble without Scottish exports. Companies operating across the border would be lumbered with administration costs of working in two currencies (and although that works between Eire and Ulster, there are costs involved).

However, Osborne says the opposite to all this, and in what we know already has been agreed with Ed Balls and Osborne's glove puppet, Alexander, he adds: "I don't think any other chancellor of the exchequer would come to a different view."

This, in itself, is odd, given that ex-chancellor, Alistair Darling, the Tory’s stooge in Better Together, famously said exactly the opposite! Not to mention the SOS for Scotland and one of the No campaigns academic advisors!

My purpose in writing this is not to go into detailed analysis of the situation, which is, in any case, beyond my economic understanding. That is more expertly covered here by Iain MacWhirter, and the options open to our government here by James Kelly. I felt however, obliged to comment upon to what I see as some sort of change in their strategy. An almost desperate turning nasty, or nastier, of the campaign, precipitated, I have no doubt, by private polling showing that they are losing the argument.

It could, of course, work. There will be those who will be frightened at the idea of starting out with another currency. Of course people will worry about pensions paid in pounds by English pension companies (or the RUK government on contributions paid over a lifetime to London). There will be people who will swallow the “border posts” stories. Barbed wire posts set up to ensure that no pounds escape from England into the badlands of the Scottish borders, no matter how many pictures you put up of postless borders between other countries.

Mind you, if this were the plan, it might have been better to make the announcement a little closer to the time, when the truth would have more difficulty in getting out. 

But I suspect many will see it for what it is: a dirty tricks campaign designed to coerce Scotland to stay with the Uk and let the smug Tory boys continue to enjoy the benefits of Scottish exports to prop up their 19^th century dreams of importance and world statesmanship, and to not suffer the indignity of being the government that lost Scotland.

Those who take the trouble to read a little more than the tabloid stories of the “Hammer blow for SNP” type, will perhaps note what the Adam Smith Institute says.

No one likes a bully, Gideon George… and, I suspect, this may well be another blunder in a long list of blunders that will backfire badly. It can hardly be doubted that, if the referendum is to be won by lies, deceptions and tricks, it will not lead to a happy nor a permanent settlement of the matter. And it won't win you international respect.

Perhaps he should have listened to Joyce Grenfell “Don’t do that, George", which I add here for your entertainment.