Saturday, 1 October 2011


A Barbecue cloud is blowing over from Britain

As I look out of the window at grey skies and a wet garden, I am intrigued to read that this October temperature is the highest on record and that Britain is sweltering in a barbeque autumn.. . Oh well, must be another Britain!

Can anyone tell me why half of last night’s news was about Michael Jackson and his doctor, as if there was no news in the world. Maybe overnight Supercam sorted all the wars, famines, recessions and currency crises. Yes?

Talking of Supercam, I heard the other day that, when he (and the Cabinet) come to Scotland to make war with our elected government over independence (that's a government elected with a majority, and on a PR system, unlike his own!!), that he should make much of his name. Cameron: a guid Scot’s haunnel. Just how dim do they think we are? Next they’ll be advising him to say that during the long vacs, his family used to come north for the haggis shooting.

Actually, with a Scots family name a Welsh name (David), a German name (William), and a Scots/Irish name (Donald), there's not much that's English about old Supercam! Just a thought.

Recently the unlovely Chris Huhne castigated us all for moaning about the price of power but not being bothered to change our electricity and gas suppliers. He might like to note that the Telegraph highlights that some of the companies are charging people to make a change. The toothless joke of a watchdog, Ofgem, suggested that there was ‘clear confusion by suppliers’. (A tad oxymoronic that!). I would suggest that they strike out the word “confusion” and replace it with “greed”. If the power company directors can’t understand and apply the regulations there should be personal liability, as in Health and Safety. A personal fine of no less than half a million pounds, I’d suggest.

England 16, Scotland 12. Well, it was foreseen by no less an authority than the Palace. In the hectic schedule for the Queen’s tour of Australia, a day was left so that if England made it through to the final, HM the Q could relax and watch the match. I suppose it never occurred to the palace that Scotland might make it through to the final. Or did the palace know that Scotland was playing.

In an article about the failure of “free schools” in Sweden to improve educational standards, the Telegraph referred to Michael Gove as the Education Secretary. Like the Palace, maybe the Telegraph requires someone to point out that little piece of land to the north of England isn’t actually a part of it. Not only do we have a rugby team; we also have an Education Secretary (and a bloody site better one than England has).

Sometimes I wonder if the Met is some sort of satire dreamed up by the BBC or other media to give us all a laugh; sometimes I think it must have been set up as a retirement home for people who always wanted to play cops and robbers; sometimes it appears to exist to collude with Rupert Murdoch and his team of crooks in the business of running a phone hacking organisation. The ongoing story of Ali Dizaei does nothing to persuade me that I got it wrong and that it is actually a crime fighting organization.

There's a wee poll at the top right hand side. I just wondered who you guys thought would be likely to take over the mantel of leader of Her Majesty's Loyal Scottish Opposition. As Dubbieside said, I should probably have offered a "who cares" option!

Niko: I'm sorry, I couldn't answer your last comment on the story yesterday. The blog won't let me comment... true. So, my response is: I've offered you a way to get rid of the English Conservative Party in Scotland, forever, but you don't seem to want to take it...

And finally, yes, I have been reading a lot of the Telegraph. And No, I've not turned into a Tory... Silly! The cartoon illustration also comes from the Telegraph, without which, it seems, Munguin would just be a burnt out shell. No comment!


  1. He could don a Tam O Shanter wear a kilt and start speaking like Molly Weir and still be the worst thing that the Unionists can do for their sainted UK. The good thing is that he does not know that and thinks that he will be spearheading the campaign to thwart the nasty old SNP. Please, please, please David come up here waving your Union Jack and singing your Eton boating song and tell us all what we ought to be doing. We are all true blue Tories really who have just strayed from the Engli...I mean British path!

  2. I'd rather have Molly Weir than him. McWitch.

    Swing, swing together
    With our bodies between our knees...

    Well, well....

  3. Cammie's cosy Conservative club.

    City's influence over Conservatives laid bare by research into donations

    No wonder they delayed any meaningful banking reforms.

  4. Well... this is an interesting list:

    David Rowland, property developer: £1,160,936

    Notoriously camera-shy, Rowland was by a distance the Conservatives' largest donor last year. The former tax exile was set to become party treasurer last year but resigned shortly before he was due to start.

    Michael Bishop, former airline head: £335,000

    Was one of the country's first openly gay senior executives when he headed BMI. Sold stake in airline to Lufthansa for £318m in 2008.

    May Makhzoumi, fibreglass pipe manufacturing and supply business: £308,000

    The biggest individual female donor. Wife of the Lebanese businessman Fouad Makhzoumi.

    JCB Research, industrial equipment company: £300,000

    Subsidiary of the Bamford family's JCB digger empire. JCB chairman Sir Anthony Bamford was nominated for a peerage by David Cameron last year, but withdrew his nomination.

    David Whelan, fitness clubs & football club owner: £100,000

    The founder of JJB Sports sold up in 2007, then later bought its fitness clubs. Also owns Wigan Athletic football club.

    John Frieda, hairdresser: £50,000

    Celebrity hairstylist with salons in London, New York, Los Angeles and Barbados. Sold his hair care products business to a Japanese corporation for £290m in 2002.

    Jeremy Isaacs, private equity firm co-owner: £50,000

    Left role as head of Lehman Brothers' European and Asian operations days before bank went bankrupt in 2008. Later co-founded private-equity group vehicle JRJ group.

    Hans Rausing, ex-packaging tycoon: £49,000

    Co-inherited Sweden's Tetra Pak group, the world's largest packaging production company, then sold out to brother Gad in 1995 for an estimated $7bn. Wife Marit also donated £49,000 last year.

    Julian Fellowes, writer and actor: £40,000

    Won an Oscar for his first Hollywood screenplay, Gosford Park, and created the hit ITV series Downton Abbey. Was made a Conservative peer in January.

    Annabel's, private members restaurant & nightclub: £20,000

    Legendary central London society haunt, frequented over the years by Frank Sinatra, Aristotle Onassis, assorted royals and David Blunkett.

    Mike Batt, composer: £20,000

    Composed such classics as Remember You're a Womble and the theme to Watership Down. Took over composing Tory election themes from Andrew Lloyd Webber and often donates in kind through music.

    Bell Pottinger, PR group: £11,900

    As representative for Trafigura, tried to prevent media revelations about the oil company's involvement in toxic waste dumping in Africa. Also represents the government in Bahrain.