Wednesday 7 April 2010

I PUT MY HANDS UP M'LUD


Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. How we did laugh.

I thought I’d take a few minutes off reading stories about how the three “main” parties, so beloved of the press, are going to make my life in this country better for me, despite the fact that we all know it’s a pile of pants. Four weeks of this. Heaven help us!

Anyway, I’m glad I took a break, for here we have England’s, Wales’s and Northern Ireland’s highest legal officer, The Rt Hon. and Learned The Baroness Scotland of Asthal QC (ironic name for the woman in charge of the law in England, Wales and NI, but we’ll let that pass) and guess what. She was done over by her cleaner. Yep, you heard me right. (OK you read me right!)

I’m glad she’s not in charge of law in this country. The idea that her cleaner is cleverer than she is is scary, you’d have to agree. Maybe they shoud swap jobs?

Scotland said she bitterly regretted not making copies of the documents Loloahi Tapui presented to her before she took up her role as housekeeper and dog walker at Scotland’s London home.

The case is embarrassing for Scotland, whose failure to do as she was obliged to do, meant that she was in breach of the 2006 Immigration, Asylum and Nationality Act that she brought to law when she was a Home Office Minister.

I have to do it for every non British national that I interview, never mind employ. Perhaps Baronesses are different, them being aristocrats and all.

Anyway, there’s something a wee bit fishy going on here. You see, she (Scotland that is) says that she explained to Tapui that, because she was a lawyer, everything had to be above board. This seems to indicate that she was being mindful of her obligations, but still, after all that, she forgot to get the stuff photocopied. Sloppy or what? (She says in her defence that there had been bereavements in her family and it had been a hard time for her......)


Worse still, Tapui told her that she knew who Scotland was, despite the fact that she said that “I didn’t use my title”. Tapui said that her husband had seen her on tv.

So, my question is. Would you, if you were an illegal immigrant, apply for a job with the Attorney General, knowing who she was, and knowing that she was likely to look into everything and want to keep records very very carefully because it was more than her job was worth to mess up?

(Well OK, I take that last bit back but the woman’s from Tonga for heaven’s sake. She wasn’t likely to know how corrupt the British government was.)

I think the answer is no. I think you would avoid applying for a job with any member of the government or any high ranking official. I think you’d be looking for someone who was tight, and dodgy from the legal point of view, who’d be happy to turn a blind eye to your illegal status and, in return not pay you properly and you wouldn’t be able to complain! Well that’s what I think...

What do you guys think?
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Pictures: The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Music....?

10 comments:

  1. A wee bit fishy indeed, I'd say. And very embarrassing for the Baroness Scotland....what with her being QC and Learned and Rt. Honourable and all.

    And I'd also like an investigation about just how it is that the Baroness Scotland has nothing whatever to do with the law in Scotland. This is also fishy, IMHO.

    When these people become Baronesses and such, have they run out of places to be named after? Was anybody in Scotland consulted to find out if it was OK for her to be Baroness Scotland? And what's with the Duke of Edinburgh, come to think of it? Was this OK with the Edinburghers? Does he do anything for them?

    This stuff all needs to be sorted out. :-)

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  2. Danny...

    Like Lord Mandelson , Baroness Scotland got her title from her surname.
    Apologies if you're not thick but just taking the mickey ; )

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  3. LOL Danny. The good Baroness hails from the Caribbean, so she has nothing to do with Scotland at all. Her name was Patricia Scotland before all the stupid nonsense of titles and seats in aristocratic houses.

    But I see what you mean. She should be called ‘Baroness Northern Ireland’ really, shouldn't she.... or possibly ‘Baroness The Rest of the UK Apart From Scotland’?

    The Duke of Edinburgh is altogether a different kettle of fish. He's Greek, so not much to do with Edinburgh and he was born Prince Philippos of Greece and Denmark, and his family name is Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glücksburg (which is a bit of a mouthful when you’re filling in your bass pass application), so I suppose that he prefers ‘Edinburgh’.

    Somehow, however, that great mouthful transmuted into Mountbatten at one stage. He may even adopt the Queen's second name which is Windsor. But you have to remember that it's only Windsor because her real name Saxe-Coberg Gotha was rather unpopular when the country was at war with Germany. I think that they compromise and use the name Mountbatten-Windsor.

    But hey it’s all academic. When Phillipos is asked his name by an officious official and he replies HRH Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, they never seem to say, but what’s your second name?!

    As for what Philippos does for Edinburgh.... well, he spends 10 days a year there and lightens the life of the average Edinburger...erm, not one bit, I'd say.

    As a footnote, the Queen is, by marriage the Duchess of Edinburgh. (I know Americans like to know these things that we Scots take for granted, but seem pretty damned weird to you guys!)

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  4. Right enough: imagine the cheek of Lord Adonis!

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  5. Anon: Danny's just taking the mickey. Thick he's definately not... LOL, but thanks for the explanation, just in case he was!!

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  6. LOL Munguin. Adonis....the lover of Aphrodite...

    Well, if it was this Adonis, all I can say is I feel sorry for poor old Aphrodite. She must have been relieved when that pig got its trotters on him...and its gnashers round him....

    As for Mrs Scotland... she's more than a silly old trout. She's trying to pull a fast one and get away with the crime she knowingly committed.

    She should be sacked and stripped of her title. She is a disgrace to the House of Lor.....

    What am I saying? She's perfectly at home in the House of Lords. She should do some expenses fiddling just to really fit in though.

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  7. PS Danny. Fine Avatar.... I'm going to share some of teh photos you sent me of Wyoming. It's just unbelievably beautiful.

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  8. Actually Anon, Tris is just being kind. I AM pretty thick. But I try to look upon ignorance as its own reward ;)

    I had no trouble spotting "Mandelson" as his noble lordship's surname. But I didn't know anything about Patricia Janet Scotland, and only thought of Scotland as a place name. DUH.....

    And thanks for the explanation Tris. In trying to understand the names of British nobility, I'm handicapped by living in a country where it's considered good form to just use the name you were born with all through your life....LOL.

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  9. Well... Anon, I'm not going to argue with Danny. If he says he's thick... he's thick, LOL But to be honest the word I associate with him is "thiNk"...

    Danny... It's simple, all this aristocratic stuff. In a country with a constitution that no one bothered to write down, because it was all a gentleman's agreement, what you do is make it up as you go along....

    Perfect.

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